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Lisa: You're all forgetting the most important thing! Which is that it's wrong to imprison an animal!
Homer: Lisa, go to your room.

(Sinking in a tar pit) Nah, that's ok. I'm pretty sure I can struggle my way out. First I'll just reach in and pull my legs out, then I'll pull my arms out with my teeth.

Homer

Lisa: Mr. Blackheart, are you an ivory dealer?
Mr. Blackheart: Well, I've had lots of jobs in my day: whale hunter, seal clubber, president of the fox network. And, like most people, yeah I've dealt a little ivory.

Bart: (to Lisa) Uh, it's hard for us to leave when you're standing there.
Homer: Push her down, son.

Bart: KBBL is going to give me something stupid!
KBBL DJ: Well, hot dog! We have a wiener!

Heh, heh. Shazzam.

Homer

(Homer hits a steel deer statue with his car)
Homer: D'oh!
Lisa: A deer!
Marge: A female deer!

Chief Wiggum: Help! Help us! They stole our uniforms guns and tazers!
Snake: (in a police uniform) Ohhhhh, Fry piggy. (charges tazer)
Chief Wiggum: No, no -- no don't -- aargh! Aargh! A little to the left... aah, that's the stuff.

I'm tired. I'm hungry. Can't we just get a new house?

Grampa: Hey, they're playing the elephant song.
Jasper: I love that. Reminds me of elephants.

Marge: (Talking about Stampy) Gosh, I thought he'd be happier in his true habitat.
Warden: Oh, I think he is.
Marge: Then why is he attacking all those other elephants?
Warden: Well, animals are not like people, Mrs. Simpson. Some of them act badly because they've had a hard life, or have been mistreated. But, like people, some of them are just jerks--Stop that, Mr. Simpson.
(The camera pans to show Homer repeatedly head butting the warden.)

I only have two questions... how much and give it to me.

Homer
Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 26 in total

The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 17 Quotes

Lisa: Dad, I think he's an ivory dealer! His boots are ivory, his hat is ivory, and I'm pretty sure that check is ivory.
Homer: Lisa, a guy who's got lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy than a guy whose ivory supplies are low.

Moe: Hey Clinton, get back to work!
Bill Clinton: Bite me.

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