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The-simpsons

Homer: So how was jerk practice, boy? Did they teach you how to sing to trees, or build crappy furniture out of useless wooden logs? Huh? (chair falls apart on him) D'oh! Stupid poetic justice
Bart: Actually, we were just planning the father-son river rafting trip
Homer: (chuckles) You don't have a son.

Marge: (to Bart) I know you think the junior campers are "square" and "uncool", but they also do a lot of neat things, like sing-alongs and flag ceremonies.
Homer: Marge! Don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals. Except the weasel.

I don't know where you magic pixies came from, but I like your pixie drink!

Barney

Marge: Homer, I have to go out to pick up something for dinner.
Homer: Steak?
Marge: Money's too tight for steak.
Homer: Steak?
Marge: Eh, sure... steak.

(to cheese doodle) Godspeed, little doodle.

Ned

Bart: Okay, we're young, rich, and full of sugar. What do we do?
Milhouse: Let's go crazy, Broadway-style!
Bart and Milhouse: (singing) Springfield, Springfield, it's a hell of a town; the schoolyard's up and the shopping mall's down; the stray dogs go to the animal pound. Springfield, Springfield! Springfield, Springfield!
Sailor: New York, New York!
Bart: New York is that a-way man!
Sailor: Thanks kid!
Bart and Milhouse: It's a hell of a town!

Hey, there's a New Mexico.

Homer

Here you go, your rubber training knife. You've attained the rank of "Pussywillow."

Flanders

Mmm... free goo.

Homer
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