The Simpsons

The Simpsons "Crook and Ladder" Quotes

Marge: Homer, I think you dominoed this.
Homer: That's ridiculous. If I had set up those dominoes I'd be wearing my special domino-setting-up knee pads.
(lifts pant legs to reveal he's wearing Dominex knee pads)
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Rod: But users are losers!
Homer: You're confusing drugs with druuuuuuugs!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: (Dazed) Zombie montage.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Why am I sleeping when right next door is every kid's dream - - a fat, suggestible, zombie dad?
 • Rating: Unrated

Firefighter: You've horribly injured the whole fire department!
Homer: Who are you, a travel agent? 'Cause you're sending me on a guilt trip!
Firefighter: Sorry.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Oh, I have 3 kids and no money. Why can't I have no kids and 3 money!?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Moe: You know, I think I'll volunteer, too.
Barney: Why'd you say "too"?
Moe: Well, I assume I'm not the first one.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mayor Quimby: It is with great pride that I place the safety of our city in the hands of the first four people who showed up.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: I can't wait for my first fire. Is that one?
Lisa: That's just someone barbecuing.
Homer: Is that one?
Bart: That's a guy with red hair.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Apu: Mr Burns, just jump into the net!
Mr. Burns: What's in it for me?
Moe: Just jump!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

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