The Simpsons

The Simpsons "Crook and Ladder" Quotes (Page 2)

Homer: Burns stiffed us!
Moe: I can't believe he acted completely in character!
 • Rating: Unrated

Apu: Are you suggesting we should steal?
Moe: Hey, it ain't stealing if you take it fast.
 • Rating: Unrated

Apu: (to Skinner) It would be a shame if the next fire you fought was in hell!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Thank God there's a fire. Marge's birthday is coming up.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Moe, I can save you if you let go of the grandfather clock.
Moe: But it's been in my family for over 40 seconds!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Moe, can we talk?
Moe: Are you crazy? It's 500 degrees in here! (Checks thermometer) Oh no wait, it's only 495. What's on your mind?
 • Rating: Unrated

Apu and Moe: (bowing to Homer) King of thieves, we worship you!
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Just come back alive, okay?
Homer: Don't tell me how to do my job!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Look at me, guys! I'm stealing five Segways at once. And speaking of segue ways, I'm off to my next morally questionable activity.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: We're not thieves. We're scavengers. Like the beautiful vulture, or the heroic tapeworm, or America's sweetheart, the maggot.
 • Rating: Unrated

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