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The-simpsons

Man: Umm, excuse me. What are you doing?
Mr. Burns: I'm giving you the beating of your life!

Oh, I'm going to lose my job just because I'm dangerously unqualified.

Wait a minute, I'll put on my snow pants.

Nerd

Boy, I can't wait to take some of the starch out of that stuffed shirt!

Finally, the great taste of Worcester sauce in a soft drink. Ahh, steaky.

Commercial

Lisa: List your three favorite books and how they have influenced your life.
Homer: Is "TV Guide" a book?
Lisa: No.
Homer: "Son of Sniglet?"
Lisa: No.
Homer: Katherine Hepburn's "Me?"
Lisa: No!
Homer: Oh, I suck!

Dad, start digging some nerd holes!

Bart

Oh, you'll pay! Don't think you won't pay!

Richard Nixon

Smithers, dismember the corpse and send his widow a corsage.

Mr. Burns

College?! Barber or clown?

Bart

Homer: Look, I'm supposed to get a physics tutor.
Nerd 1: Well, you've come to the right place then. If there's one thing we know, it is science.
Nerd 2: And math.
Nerd 3: And the words to every Monty Python routine.
Nerds: (in unison) We are the Knights Who Say Ni! Ni!
(laughter)
Homer: Heh heh Ni.

That sounds like a pig fainting!

Dean
Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 36 in total

The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 3 Quotes

Mr. Burns: Oh, and one more thing: you must find the jade monkey before the next full moon.
Smithers Actually sir, we found the jade monkey. It was in your glove compartment.
Mr. Burns: And the road maps, and ice scraper?
Smithers: They were in there too, sir.
Mr. Burns: Excellent! It's all falling into place...

Benjamin: Come on, Mr. Simpson, you'll never pass this course without learning the periodic table.
Homer: I'll write it on my hand.
Benjamin: Hoh! Including all known lanthanides & actinides? Good luck!

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