The Simpsons

The Simpsons "Homer Loves Flanders" Quotes

Maude: Come on, Ned! Move this thing!
Ned: I can't! It's a Geo!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Why do you mock me, O Lord?
Marge: Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up there. (She scrapes it down with a broom.)
Homer: I know I shouldn't eat thee, but--(Eats waffle)--Mmm... sacrilicious.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marge: Homer! Are you planning to hit Ned Flanders with that pipe and steal his tickets?
Homer: Yeno.
Ned: (answers door) Huh? (Homer ges ready to hit him, but changes his mind)
Homer: Oh. Flanders, I decided I'd like to go to the game with you.
Ned: Well, get out the Crayolas and color me "Tickled Pink". Ooh, what's with the lead pipe, were you going to give my noggin a flogging?
Homer: Well, yeah.
(they both laugh)
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: It's okay. There's no sugar in Pixie sticks.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Marge, I think I hate Ted Koppel. No, wait. I find him informative and witty.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Kent Brockman: Springfield has come down with a fever . . . Football fever. If you have the fever, there's only one cure. Take two tickets and see the game Sunday morning.
TV Voiceover: Warning, tickets should not be taken internally.
Homer: See, because of me, now they have a warning.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ned: Homer, I'd love to chitty-chat, but tonight's the night I do my charity work.
Homer: Oh yeah. The judge made me do that once too. Stupid lack of public urinals.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Lenny: Hey, look! Homer's got one of those robot cars.
(Crash)
Carl: One of those American robot cars.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: (chuckling) I did it! Second in line, and all I had to do was miss eight days of work.
Man: With the money you would have made working, you could have bought tickets from a scalper.
Homer: In theory, yes. Jerk.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Homer: Why am I such a loser? Why?
Bart: Well, your father was a loser, and his father, and his father ... it's genetic, man. D'oh!
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

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