The Simpsons Season 22 Episode 12: "Homer The Father" Quotes
Okay, but don't read our subtitles.CIA Guy
Bart: Can I betray the country I pledge allegiance to every day?
CIA Guy #1: You pledge allegiance to the flag.
CIA Guy #2: And the flag is made in China.
Apu: Mr. Homer, you inadvertently left your nuclear power plant ID in the birthday card rack.
Homer: I can't lose that, it's the best picture I have.
Apu: I am more concerned with global terrorism. America's enemies would give anything for your nuclear knowledge.
Homer: Yeah. I do know a lot about nuclears.
Apu: And America has so many enemies: Iran, Iraq, China, Mordor, the hoochies that laid low Tiger Woods, undesirable immigrants, by which I mean everyone that came after me, including my children.
Ghost: How could you mistake him for me?
Willie: It was that sassy mouth that got you killed in the first place.
Bart: Those are girl overalls!
Milhouse: I could pull it off.
I never thought of fatherhood as something that could affect a kid.
Oh my god I think I just met the thing I'm going to die on.Bart
Life was so much easier when a machine told you when to laugh.