The Simpsons

The Simpsons "Homer the Heretic" Quotes (Page 3)

Homer: God, I gotta ask you something. What's the meaning of life?
God: Homer, I can't tell you that.
Homer: C'mon!
God: You'll find out when you die.
Homer: I can't wait that long!
God: You can't wait six months?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Apu: You are on your honor not to steal anything.
Kearny: (lying and eating a box of cereal) Oh we won't.
Apu looks at them for a moment and then puts a little boy on the counter.
Apu: Little Jamshed, the store is in your hands.
Little Jamshed: Oh, how I have waited for this day. (whips out a shot gun and cocks it.)
Kearny's shocked as his mouth hangs open and he drops the box of cereal.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Boy, everyone is stupid except me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Hey, where's Homer?
Marge: Your father is... resting.
Bart: Resting "hung over," resting "got fired," come on, help me out here!
 • Rating: Unrated

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