The Simpsons

The Simpsons "I Married Marge" Quotes

(Dr. Hibbert is performing an ultrasound on Marge. On the monitor, the Bart fetus turns his back to the transducer and wiggles his butt)
Dr. Hibbert: Hmm. If I didn't know any better, I'd swear he was trying to moon us.
 • Rating: Unrated

(Homer and Marge get married at Shotgun Pete's)
Minister: Then, by the power vested in my by the state gaming commission, I pronounce you man and wife. Here's ten dollars worth of chips. You may kiss the bride. Next!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: (On God) Oh, He's always happy. No, wait...he's always mad.
 • Rating: Unrated

Smithers: (Interviewing Homer) Now, let's say there's a problem with the reactor--
Homer: There's a problem with the reactor?! We're all gonna die!
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Barnacle Bill's Home Pregnancy Test? Homer, shouldn't we have gone with a better-known brand?
Homer: But Marge, this one came with a corn-cob pipe!
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Well, I guess I better go see Dr. Hibbert.
Homer: Oh honey, do you really think you're pregnant?
Marge: Well, I've had the same nausea and craving for pancake mix I did with the other kids.
Homer: Yeah, and I have the same tightness in my chest and the sweating I always get.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Yeah, sure, for you a baby's all fun and games, for me it's diaper changes and midnight feeding!
Lisa: Shouldn't mom do all that stuff?
Homer: Yeah, but I have to hear about it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: It's Homer!
Patty: I don't know what you see in that ugly meatball!
Selma: Uh huh, If you like being pawed by something fat and lazy, we could get a cat.
Jacqueline: It would leave less hair on the couch!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Wow! What an ending. Who would have thought Darth Vader was Luke Skywalker's father!
Guy: Oh thank you Mr. Blow the picture for me!
 • Rating: Unrated

Mr. Burns: Who was that young hellcat, Smithers?
Smithers: Homer Simpson, sir.
Mr. Burns: Simpson, eh? I'll remember that name.
 • Rating: Unrated

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