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The-simpsons

(Krusty is being attacked by some sort of giant bird.)
Animal Specialist: She must think you are after her eggs.
Krusty: I only ate one!

Good news, boy. I found a pharmacy that carries leeches! Well, it wasn't exactaly a pharmacy. More of a bait shop.

</i> Grandpa

Maggie? Oh, you must be sick. Let's see, what's old Dr. Washburn prescibe? Do you have dropsy? The grippe? Scofula? The vapors? Jungle rot? Dandy fever? Poor man's gout? Housemaid's knee? Climatic poopow? The staggers? Dum-dum fever?

</i> Abe

Mr. Burns: I want you to show this woman the time of her life.
Homer: Gotcha! Marge, we're getting some drive-thru, then we're doing it twice!

Bart, to avoid this test, you've had smallpox, the bends, and that unfortunate bout of Tourette's syndrome.

Edna

Grampa: Have you ever read "The Boy Who Cried Wolf"?
Bart: I glanced at it. Boy cries wolf, has a few laughs I forget how it ends.

Edna: Well, then, you're ready for your make-up test.
Bart: Ohhhhhh! My ovaries.

Mr. Burns: I must have her! Smithers, zoom in. Closer! Closer! Closer, dammit!
(the camera hits Marge in the head)
Marge: Ow!
Mr. Burns: Too close.

Marge: What do I do?
Smithers: Heh, heh, heh. Marge, please! According to your resume, you invented this machine.

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