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The-simpsons

Kent Brockman: What have you been up to, Lurleen?
Lurleen Lumpkin: I spent last night in a ditch.

Leonard Nimoy: A solar eclipse: the cosmic ballet goes on.
Man sitting next to Nimoy: Does anybody want to switch seats?

Marge: Homer, there's a man here who thinks he can help you!
Homer: Batman?
Marge: No, he's a scientist.
Homer: Batman's a scientist.
Marge: It's not Batman!

Marge: We're too late!
Cobb: I shouldn't have stopped for that haircut. Sorry.

Marge: Homer, there's a family of possums in here.
Homer: I call the big one "bitey."

Homer: Do you want to change your name to Homer Junior? The kids can call you Ho-Ju!
Bart: ...I'll get back to you.

Lyle Lanley: Now, I'm here to answer any questions you children may have about the monorail.
Kid: Can it outrun the flash?
Lyle Lanley: You bet.
Kid: Can superman outrun the flash?
Lyle Lanley: Eh, sure, why not.

I'll just amuse myself with some pornographic playing cards.

Mayor Quimby

Marge: How fast is it going?
(Sees Homer scream in the speeding monorail passing by.)
Scientist: Well, judging by your husband's cowardly scream, 480 miles per hour.

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