The Simpsons

Sundays 8:00 PM on FOX
The simpsons
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Bart: Lower the draw bridge!
Lisa: What's the password?
Bart: (slowly) I love my sister.

Selma: Wanna split a basket of garlic bread?
Grampa: Slow down you hussie!

Build a fart, I love it! (Laughs hard)

Bart

Homer: Okay everyone ahead is my big surprise!
(Bart, Lisa, and Marge fall down the stairs.)
Homer: Watch out for the stairs.

(Homer and Marge catch Selma kissing Grampa)
Homer: (screams) A bear is eating my father!
Selma: I'm Selma!
Homer: (screams) A talking bear is eating my father!

Marge: Grampa's driving me crazy!
Homer: Why are you telling me? He's YOUR father-in-law.

(Bart and Lisa are playing Ping Pong.)
Bart: Ping.
Lisa: Pong.
Bart: Ping.
Lisa: Pong.

Accountant: Three subscriptions to Vanity Fair?
Homer: I've got three bathrooms, don't I?

Homer: Permission to moan?
Judge Harm: I'll allow it.
(Homer makes a loud and long moan.)

I thought bankruptcy was the cool law. The one that says, "Dude, don't worry about it, I got this."

Homer
Displaying quotes 13 - 22 of 22 in total

The Simpsons Season 18 Episode 15 Quotes

Abe: My roof, my rules!
Homer: Oh, why did I borrow that roof from him?

Accountant: You throw over one thousand dollars a month into local wishing wells.
Homer: Yeah, you idiot, 'cause I'm wishing for more money!