The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 19: "Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song" Quotes
Bart: Boys and girls, Mrs. Krabappel, I come before you today to solve a riddle that has plagued mankind for centuries: What has four legs and ticks?
Milhouse: A walking clock?
Nelson: A walking clock!
Martin: I'd wager he has some variety of walking clock in that box!
Edna: Bart, is it a walking clock?
Bart: What?.....No, it's my dog.
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Nelson: The ingredients were: fresh pureed tomatoes, water, salt, and sodium benzoate used to retard spoilage. Once again, if I'm not mistaken, this can contained tomato paste.
Edna: Thank you, Nelson. I look forward to seeing it again next week.
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Thank the Lord? That sounded like a prayer. A prayer. A prayer in a public school! God has no place within these walls, just like facts have no place within organized religion!Superintendent Chalmers
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Principal Skinner: Er, one question remains: how do I get out of the army?
Bart: No problemo. Just make a pass at your commanding officer.
Principal Skinner: Done and done. And I mean done!
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(After watching the clips of the home video)
Bart: Ha ha ha ha. They're going to eat this up at show and tell.
Marge: I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with the idea of your classmates laughing at our family's private moments. How would you like it if 20 years from now people were laughing at things you did?
Bart: Not likely. Come on, have a sense of humor about yourself. (Watches the clip of himself on the toilet saying "I'm a big boy today," then Lisa laughs) Uhhhh I gotta find somethin' else quick.
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Superintendent Chalmers: You're fired!
Principal Skinner: I'm sorry, did... did you just call me a liar?
Superintendent Chalmers: No, I said you were fired.
Principal Skinner: Oh. That's much worse.
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Superintendent Chalmers: Oh, I have had it; I have had it with this school, Skinner! The low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children.
Principal Skinner: Oh, now I really think the children's appearance--
Superintendent Chalmers: Seymour! You are in very, very big trouble.
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There's nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman.Groundskeeper Willy
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More testicles mean more iron!Lunch Lady Doris
- Permalink: More testicles mean more iron!