The Simpsons

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The simpsons
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Homer's Brain: This is it, Homer. It's time to tell her the terrible secret from your past.
Homer: Marge, I ate those fancy soaps you bought for the bathroom.
Marge: Oh, my God!
Homer's Brain: No, the other secret!
Homer: Marge, I never graduated from High School.
Marge: Well, that still doesn't explain why you ate my soap. Wait, maybe it does.

Eh, I could pull a better cartoon out of my a...heheheh-hey! Whoa! Wasn't that great, kids?

Krusty

Bart: What are you going to change your name to when you grow up?
Lisa: Lois Sanborn.
Bart: Steve Bennett.

(Typing a letter) Dear Mr. President, there are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three. I am not a crackpot.

Grampa

Homer: Alright brain. You don't like me and I don't like you. But let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer
Homer's Brain: It's a deal.

Bart: Didn't you wonder why you were getting checks for doing nothing?
Grampa: I figured it was because the Demmie-crats were back in power.

Dondelinger: Welcome to Remedial Science 1A. My wife recently passed away. I thought that maybe teaching would ease my loneliness.
Homer: Will this be on the test?
Dondelinger: No!
Homer: Ohhh. (Erases note from his cheat sheet)

Displaying quotes 13 - 19 of 19 in total

The Simpsons Season 4 Episode 19 Quotes

Secretary: Is this the Abraham Simpson who wrote the Itchy and Scratchy episode?
Grampa: Ishy and what? No, you must be some kind of crazy person.
Secretary: I'm sorry, but we have a substantial check here for a Mr. Abraham Simpson.
Grampa: That's right. I did the Iggy.

Hey, Mel. Bring me another nicotine patch. I think there's some space on my butt.

Krusty