Sundays 8:00 PM on FOX
The-simpsons

I'm blue collar. I'm totally blue collar. My dad owns a shovel.

Andy Dick

Hey! This peppy stuff isn't bad! Maybe I will write that jingle for Buzz Cola.

Stephen Sondheim

Look at those morons! They sing because they're stupid.

Homer

I don't sign anything, unless I pretend to read it. (pretending to read a contract) Hamburger, hamburger, hamburger, hamburger, looks good to me.

Cletus

Then I had this crazy dream that my family were all just cartoon characters and that our success led to some crazy propaganda network called Fox News.

Bart

(at therapy)
Apu: He used to rob me two, three times a week. Now, I'm lucky if I get it once a month.
Snake: He never initiates it; I have to do all the work. He just stands there.

They say that Dark Stanley will kill you, then go wee-wee in your skull.

Milhouse

Groundskeeper Willie: I'll bring those kids back dead or alive!
Skinner: Not DEAD!
Groundskeeper Willie: Aw, you never let Willie be Willie!

Lisa: What kind of lunch is this? A drawing of a sandwich.
Bart: All I got is Grandpa's medication.

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