The Simpsons

The Simpsons Season 18 Quotes (Page 11)

Season 18 Episode 12: "Little Big Girl"

Homer: (calling Bart) Bart! This is a matter of life and death! What is the difference between 'ketchup' and 'catsup'? (Bart throws the cell phone away.) They're gonna cut my head off!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Bart, take these volleyballs, fill them up, and throw them over the prison wall to create chaos and confusion.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: I need a ride. I think I'm in Chinatown. (a mouse run in the street) No, not our Chinatown.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: You know, I thought Darcy and I would be like a real married couple. Instead, we just ended up fighting all the time.
Homer: Yeah, how 'bout that?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bart: I want a license.
Mayor Quimby: To kill?
Bart: No, to drive!
 • Rating: Unrated

Lisa: Show's over, let's go.
Homer: What's your hurry?
Lisa: Well, some of my report, um, wasn't thoroughly fact checked.
Homer: (Laughs) My little girl's just like CBS News.
 • Rating: Unrated

Darcy: Wow, you really are 10. I thought you were just stupid.
Bart: I'm 10 and stupid!
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Bart, you're too young to get married! You still ask me to check the closet for the boogeyman!
Bart: Well, maybe I've found somebody else to do it for me!
 • Rating: Unrated

(Smithers is on fire, while Mr. Burns is washing his car.)
Smithers: Sir, help me!
Mr. Burns: Why should I? You're not helping me.
Smithers: But sir, I'm flaming!
(Mr. Burns looks at the camera with an odd expression)
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 18 Episode 11: "Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times"

Rich Texan: Outta my way, you seatbelt wearing cowards.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Oh little mouse, you are only thing keeping me sane. (Eats mouse.)
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: (While crawling through a tunnel) I wonder how long this tunnel isssssssssssss! (Falls in water, into a cage that locks up). D'oh!
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Ay Carumba!
(outside the story)
Bart: That's the only line I get in your stupid story?
Lisa: There's no such thing as small parts, just small actors. (Laughs)
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: (Angrily at the Rich Texan) Reeevenge!!!
 • Rating: Unrated

Lou: No sign of the Serpent.
Wiggum: It's always work with you.
 • Rating: Unrated

Woman 1: When will we meet the count?
Woman 2: Do you think he'll like us?
Man: I've heard rumors he's mysterious.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Revenge never solves anything!
Homer: (sarcastically) Then what's America doing in Iraq?
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: (Crashes through window) Party's over, Serpent.
Wiggum: No kidding, you're standing in the dip.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: (after Lisa's story) Wow! That had what I really like in a story - an ending!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bart: Now we have three ways to talk about revenge, although the first two were sort of the same, and even the third would have worked better as a Halloween Story.
 • Rating: Unrated

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