The Simpsons

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The simpsons

Carl: Yeah, you should always make peace with your loved ones.
Lenny: I think I'll give my ma a call right now. (dials cell phone) Hey Mom, I just wanted you to know that you mean... Yeah, he's here... (looks disappointed, gives phone to Carl)
Carl: Hey, Mrs. L! Those butter cookies you sent, were tasty. And the almond ones, oh! (pause) Aw, I wish I was your son, too. All right, I'm gonna pass you back... Okay, okay, I'll tell him. (closes cell phone) Uh, Moe. Lenny's mom says, she loves you.
(Lenny makes disgusted noise)

Marge: (To Bart) Say something comforting.
Bart: Okay, comforting, comforting. Uh, Dad? Whenever I would hang out with Grandma she would always ask me about you and I'd say, "You suck." And she would say, "You don't suck that bad."
Homer: She said I didn't suck?
Bart: That bad.
Homer: That bad. Wow.
Bart: Yeah.

Marge: Thank God they're not jeering at us anymore.
Homer: I know. (pause) Kinda miss it.
Bart: I know! We'll be in another movie. And this time we'll act really bad!
Marge: No more Simpsons movies! One was plenty.

Hey, Nelson! Say something poor!

</i> Man

(to Lisa) Seymour Skinner never puts all his eggs in one basket. That's why they call me "Two Basket Skinner." (pause) What? They do.

Principal Skinner

I like to cry at the ocean, because only there do my tears seem small.

</i> Nelson

I never wanted to be famous for being mean. I wanted to be famous for catching Santa Claus.

Homer

Call me old-fashioned, but I usually don't like movies that humiliate our family in front of the world.

Marge

(about the Springfield Creative Arts School)The whole school is made up of modeling clay! Every afternoon, they re-shape it just to get my goat!

Superintendent Chalmers

Lisa: No toupees.
Homer: Whaaat, I'm going for the Shia LaBeouf thing. Not quite a nerd, not quite a hunk. Shia LaBeouf!

Jim Jarmusch: I can eat a raw onion without crying.
Homer: Oh yeah? Prove it, Hollywood!
(Jim Jarmusch eats an onion and tears up)
Homer: Hey, you're crying!
Jim Jarmusch: Yes, but I'm crying about something else.

Sorry, Lise. I can't be a vegetarian. I love the taste of death.

Bart
Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 194 in total

The Simpsons Season 19 Quotes

Why do I need another penny? I have billions. Still, if I don't take it, that hoodlum over there might.

Mr. Burns

Homer: One small coffee, please. And a bunch of those placemats with the mazes on them.
Pimple-Faced Kid: They're all the same maze.
Homer: Somebody's gotta do 'em.

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