The Simpsons

The Simpsons

Sundays 8:00 PM on FOX

Latest Review

Upcoming Episode

Season: 24 23 22 21 20 19 18 5 4 3 2 1

The Simpsons Season 22 Quotes (Page 5)

Season 22 Episode 14: "Angry Dad: The Movie"

Homer: And I'd like to thank the women who's been inspiring me for the last 25 years... the cute one from The Bangles.
 • Rating: Unrated
Homer: Don't feel bad boy. Everyone makes mistakes. Yours is just public and expensive.
 • Rating: Unrated
Herman Millwood: Is Bart Simpson here? Because I'm about to make him and his family very wealthy
Homer: Wealthy? Remember the guy that drove you to school that one time?
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 22 Episode 13: "The Blue and the Gray"

Marge: You guys went gray yourselves.
Selma: No we didn't, this is just smoke and ash.
 • Rating: Unrated
Ralph: Grandma had hair like that when she went to sleep in her forever box.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0
Homer: What has she done!? I feel like I'm married to Richard Gere.
 • Rating: Unrated
Bart: I just have one question about hair, where does mine start?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Moe: I'm Moe Szyslak. Growing up, I had roundworm. Heck I was more worm than man some months. I dabbled in satanism until I was asked to leave. Oh and one month I ate nothing by aquarium fish.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Homer: A lot of great movie stars have gray hairs. Like all those women we loved in the 80's.
 • Rating: Unrated
Dr. Kissingher: If you're watching this, your love life is like Sister Act 3 - no Whoopi.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 22 Episode 12: "Homer The Father"

CIA Guy: Okay, but don't read our subtitles.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
Bart: Can I betray the country I pledge allegiance to every day?
CIA Guy #1: You pledge allegiance to the flag.
CIA Guy #2: And the flag is made in China.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Apu: Mr. Homer, you inadvertently left your nuclear power plant ID in the birthday card rack.
Homer: I can't lose that, it's the best picture I have.
Apu: I am more concerned with global terrorism. America's enemies would give anything for your nuclear knowledge.
Homer: Yeah. I do know a lot about nuclears.
Apu: And America has so many enemies: Iran, Iraq, China, Mordor, the hoochies that laid low Tiger Woods, undesirable immigrants, by which I mean everyone that came after me, including my children.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Ghost: How could you mistake him for me?
Willie: It was that sassy mouth that got you killed in the first place.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Bart: Those are girl overalls!
Milhouse: I could pull it off.
 • Rating: Unrated
Homer: I never thought of fatherhood as something that could affect a kid.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Bart: Oh my god I think I just met the thing I'm going to die on.
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0
Homer: Life was so much easier when a machine told you when to laugh.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 22 Episode 11: "Flaming Moe"

Moe: Not bad. Like Frisbee Golf, I'm glad I tried it once.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
Superintendent Chalmers: Willie, you're the new principal.
Willie: Who's the new groundskeeper?
Superintendent Chalmers: Also you. And you don't get more money.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Are we missing your favorite "The Simpsons" quote? Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!


Season: 24 23 22 21 20 19 18 5 4 3 2 1
Total Season 22 Quotes: 203
Total The Simpsons Quotes: 3302
SheKnows entertainment