The Simpsons

The Simpsons Season 4 Quotes (Page 12)

Season 4 Episode 10: "Lisa's First Word"

Lisa: It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Homer's Brain: What does that mean? Better say something or they'll think you're stupid.
Homer: Takes one to know one.
Homer's Brain: Swish!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: When the working day is done, girls just wanna have fu-hun. That's all we really waaaant.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: Then the prince and the princess... got married and lived happily ever after.
Bart: Then what happened?
Marge: Uh...they had thirty sons and thirty daughters.
Bart: What were their names?
Marge: Hmm...Dennis...Brad...Mavis...Brad...(falls alseep)
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now!
Homer: We're going to start doing it in the morning?!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's crib and Bart'll sleep with us until he's 21.
Marge: Won't that warp him?
Homer: My cousin Frank did it.
Marge: You don't have a cousin Frank.
Homer: He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu now.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Selma: Hey Bart, want a dollar? Uh uh uh, you know what I wanna hear.
Bart: I'm a little teapot short and stout, this is my handle this is my spout. The incy wincy spider went up the water spout...
Selma: Oh yeah! Love that spout medley.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Hey Homer ,this house sucks!
Homer: Bart, I told you not to use that word. Call me daddy!
 • Rating: Unrated

Ned: If you need anything just give a whistle.
Homer: I could use a TV tray.
Ned: Well, gee...
Homer: What?
Ned: Uh, I just this minute bought it at the hardware...
Homer: You said "anything".
Ned: Heh, sure, you can borrow it for...a little while.
--
Homer: And that little while is now eight years and counting.
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: I am so great! I am so great! Everybody loves me, I am so great!
Marge: Honey, honey, honey, honey, honey. Could you please be quiet?
Bart: Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quie --
Marge: Bart, get out!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Alright, I know how to handle this, just use a little reverse psychology. Let's go Marge. Leave the baby with his little crib............. AAAAAARGHHH!
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Can't sleep, clown'll eat me!
 • Rating: Unrated

Rod/Todd: I've got some joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart. (Where?) Down in my heart to stay! And if the devil doesn't like it, he can sit on a tack. (Ouch!) Sit on a tack. (Ouch!)
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: I was sitting there!
Lisa: I don't see your name on it!
Bart: It's right there!
Marge: Bart, don't write on the rug.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: You know Maggie, the sooner kids talk the sooner they talk back. I hope you never say a word.
Maggie: Daddy.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bart: Homer!
Homer: No, Bart. Homer is what grownups call me. Call me Daddy.
Bart: Homer.
Homer: Daddy.
Bart: Homer.
Homer: Daddy.
Bart: DadaDomer.
Homer: Why, you little?!
 • Rating: Unrated

(Homer watches Krusty the Clown on TV)
Homer: I think he's a clown. He he he he.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marge: According to Fretful Mother magazine, if Maggie doesn't talk by age one, we should consider a corrective tongue-extender.
 • Rating: Unrated

Flanders: (holding baby Lisa) Hi-dee-ho, Simpson. Your son shoved this through our doggy door. And since we're returning your second-born, do you think you could see your way to returning my TV tr--
(Homer takes Lisa and slams the door in Flanders' face)
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Dad, I have a problem.
Grampa: Why did you come to me? I don't know nothin'. I used to get by on my looks. Now they're gone... withered away like an old piece of fruit. (Sobs)
Homer: Are you done?
Grampa: No, not yet! I was voted the handsomest boy in Albany, New York!
Homer: Dad, I don't need advice! I need 15,000 dollars to buy a home!
Grampa: Oh, well. All I own is this house, that I built with my own two hands!
Homer: You didn't build this house! You won it on a crooked 50's game show!
Grampa: I ratted on everybody and got off scott free!
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Can you say Daddy?
Baby Lisa: Homer.
Homer: No sweetie, Daddy.
(Pause)
Baby Lisa: Homer.
Homer: D'oh!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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