Mayor Quimby: These look like teeth marks.
Homer: I thought there was chocolate inside.... Well, why was it wrapped in foil?
Mayor Quimby: It was never wrapped in foil!

• Permalink: These look like teeth marks. I thought there was chocolate ins...
• Added: February 24, 2010

Homer: There's a $10,000 bill in it for you.
Barney: Oh yeah? Which president's on it?
Homer: Uh, all of them. They're having a party. Jimmy Carter's passed out on the couch.

• Permalink: There's a $10,000 bill in it for you. Oh yeah? Which presiden...
• Added: February 24, 2010

Bart: Who's up at 3:17 AM watching TV?
Homer: Alcoholics, the unemployable, angry loners...

• Permalink: 17 AM watching TV? Alcoholics, the unemployable, angry loners....
• Added: February 24, 2010

Homer: My prices are so low, you'll think I've suffered brain damage.
Bart: You are fully bonded and licensed by the city, aren't you, Mr. Plow?
Homer: Shut up, boy.

• Permalink: My prices are so low, you'll think I've suffered brain damage. ...
• Added: February 24, 2010

Kent: Hardest hit by the blizzard is Springfield's forbidding Widow's Peak. Our own Arnie Pie is on the scene.
(Arnie is doing a live remote by helicopter)
Arnie: Everything's snowed in! All I can see is white!
Kent: Arnie, please! The ski conditions.
Arnie: (Camera is upsidedown) Mayday! Mayday! I think I'm flying into a mountain! Tell my wife I lo- (Static)
Kent: That's great, Arnie!

• Permalink: Hardest hit by the blizzard is Springfield's forbidding Widow's ...
• Added: February 24, 2010

It may be on a lousy channel, but the Simpsons are on TV!

Homer

• Permalink: It may be on a lousy channel, but the Simpsons are on TV!
• Added: February 24, 2010

Homer's Brain: Don't tell him you were at a bar! (gasp) But what else is open at night?
Homer: It's a pornography store. I was buying pornography.

• Permalink: Don't tell him you were at a bar! But what else is open at nigh...
• Added: February 24, 2010

Homer: Well, I really should discuss this with my wife.
Salesman: Your wife? (cracks an imaginary whip)
Homer: What, you think I'm going to buy a $20,000 truck just because you
make that noise?
Salesman: (cracks his whip again)
Homer: Okay, I'll take it.

• Permalink: Well, I really should discuss this with my wife. Your wife? ...
• Added: February 24, 2010

(singing) Call Mr. Plow. That's my name, that name again is Mr. Plow!

Homer

• Permalink: Call Mr. Plow. That's my name, that name again is Mr. Plow!
• Added: February 24, 2010

Now we play the waiting game..... Ahh, the waiting game sucks. Let's play Hungry Hungry Hippos!

Homer

• Permalink: Now we play the waiting game..... Ahh, the waiting game sucks. L...
• Added: February 24, 2010

Ronstadt: When the snow starts a-fallin', There's a man you should be callin', That's KL5-4796, Let it ring! Mr. Plow is a loser and I think he is a boozer.
Barney: So you better make that call to the Plow King!

• Permalink: When the snow starts a-fallin', There's a man you should be call...
• Added: February 24, 2010

Homer: Flanders, I thought I was your plow man?
Ned: Uh Homer, why don't you plow it again?
Homer: Forget it, pal. I don't need your phoney baloney job. I'll take your money, but I'm not gonna plow your driveway!

• Permalink: Flanders, I thought I was your plow man? Uh Homer, why don't y...
• Added: February 24, 2010