Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 5: "Giant Cat Holding Churro" Quotes
I may love broadway musicals, and have a keen eye for fashion, but that's where it ends.Alan
You feel like an idiot? That casting agent said he could get me on Melrose Place.Lyndsey
Walden: If I weren't here, would you be masturbating?
Alan: Are you kidding? I'd be done and fixing a sandwich.
Alcohol is just a bandage for the problem. I know this because I used to live with the mummy.Alan
Lyndsey: I'm so full it'd be like sticking a pin in a balloon.
Alan: Can we please not call it a pin?