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Two-and-a-half-men

Man, If I'd known you liked the whacky weed, I wouldn't have spent the last eight years getting baked under the deck. You know, when I was on break.

Berta

Alan: Let me tell you something young man, chapter two of your father's story hasn't been written.
Jake: Is chapter one, "I crapped my pants?"

Alan: My life isn't over you know.
Jake: Okay.
Alan: What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger.
Jake: Then you must be like the hulk.

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather get a maple syrup enema and sit on an ant pile.

Charlie

Alan: You might want to eat something so when you throw up later, it won't just be alcohol and stomach juice.
Charlie: Way ahead of you. (holds up drink) I call it an Egg McBorboun.

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Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 21 Quotes

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather get a maple syrup enema and sit on an ant pile.

Charlie

Alan: You might want to eat something so when you throw up later, it won't just be alcohol and stomach juice.
Charlie: Way ahead of you. (holds up drink) I call it an Egg McBorboun.

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