Two and a Half Men "Springtime on a Stick" Quotes
Evelyn: I'll be right back,
Alan: Where are you going?
Evelyn: To put on panties.
• Rating: Unrated
Evelyn: It's all right, I never expect much of you. And you never disappoint me.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Evelyn: What is wrong with him (Jake)?
Alan: Nothing organic. We've had him checked.
• Rating: Unrated
Alan: Birthday card for mom -- sign it.
Charlie: No thanks. Come back with a "do not resuscitate" form and we'll talk.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Russell: When you came in the store, I was higher than Mel Gibson on Passover.
• Rating: 4.5 / 5.0
Russell: Want a codeine popsicle? It's my own invention.
Charlie: I think we're good.
Russell: You suck on one of these, you'll be great. I call it, "springtime on a stick."
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Evelyn: You go out with a girl and break up with her hoo-hah can develop a 5'o clock shadow.
Alan: Well, in his defense mom, he's usually paying by the hour.
• Rating: Unrated
Evelyn: If you excuse me, I'm going to go drown my sorrows in alcohol.
Charlie: If you're not committed to alcohol, there's a whole big ocean out there.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Alan: Don't worry, she doesn't commit suicide, she inspires it.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jake: I thought you had a date tonight?
Charlie: Not a date. A date experience.
Megan: What's the difference?
Charlie: About $1500.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Are we missing your favorite quote from "Springtime on a Stick?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!
Total Quotes: 10
