Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS

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Two and a Half Men "Twanging Your Magic Clanger" Quotes

Alan: Are you really that superficial, vain and shallow?
Charlie: Yes. Yes. And yes.
 • Rating: Unrated
Michelle: You've got my number, right?
Charlie: Indeed I do. ... 47.
 • Rating: Unrated
Charlie: Oh, try MalibuPuddingGirls.com.
Alan: Pudding Girls?
Charlie: Trust me.
Alan: Oh ... ew.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0
Alan: It's not what it looks like.
Charlie: That's a relief cause it looks like you were masturbating to mariachi music in your car.
Alan: I only get AM radio!
 • Rating: Unrated
Michelle: That's my daughter. For all intents and purposes, she's eight.
 • Rating: Unrated
Alan: Think of this way - when she's 70, you're likely to be dead for 10 years.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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Total Quotes: 6
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