Wilfred

Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FX
Wilfred
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However I need to change, I'll change. I just can't go another two years without you in my life.

Henry

Katherine: It's like he's trying to sing.
Wilfred: Trying? Was Oates trying?

Pumpkin? Just so I understand, your dad nicknamed his daughter after the scent of her vagina?

Wilfred

Your dad is just how I pictured him...pure evil. He even looks like Michael Vick.

Wilfred

Getting tangled up in Christmas lights IS a workout.

Wilfred

Girl? Do you not see this penis right here? Well actually that's a gum drop stuck in my fur.

Wilfred

Andre: Actually I'm the caretaker assigned to accompany your mother tonight.
Katherine: It's complicated.
Andre: It's not complicated at all. I'm gonna wait in the car.

Ryan: Would you mind hanging out in the basement?
Wilfred: But it's not Christmas without Wilfred.

Now's your chance to stand up to him...perhaps in the form of a Beat It style knife fight.

Wilfred

Santa is the mail man on steroids.

Wilfred

Kristen: Mom's insane asylum...
Ryan: It's not an insane asylum. It has like ducks.
Kristen: Fine, her duck sanctuary.

Displaying all 11 quotes

Wilfred Season 3 Episode 9 Quotes

Santa is the mail man on steroids.

Wilfred

Kristen: Mom's insane asylum...
Ryan: It's not an insane asylum. It has like ducks.
Kristen: Fine, her duck sanctuary.