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I'm sorry Annie. I'm not the worker-bee type. I'm more of a silver back gorilla with the claws of a lion, the teeth of a shark and the quiet dignity of a tortoise.

Jeff

What is it about me that make broken people flock to me? Is it my height? Do huddled masses mistake me for the statue of liberty?

Jeff

Jeff: Everyone wants you to shut up.
Britta: And yet I won't. Case in point.

Oh Abed. Will your reality ever come out on Blu-Ray so we can enjoy it?

Jeff

Pierce, take it from an expert. These people are just outside your heart. Let them in, before it's too late.

Jeff

Jeff: What are you doing here Change and how do you know where I live?
Chang: I can answer both of those questions by returning your driver's license.

Jeff: Don't kid a lawyer.
Annie: Well if I see one, I won't.

It's got to be better than wine tasting with Pierce. He refused to drink Pinot Noir because he thought it was French for "black penis."

Jeff

He also listens to the Barenaked Ladies. Go get their dumbasses to help you.

Jeff
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