So, um, I, um, got a taxi for you, baby ... I set up everything for you. Are you good?

I don't even know. Who knows, dog. That's the first time. The first time that has happened. But I'm a trooper! I'm The Situation, man!

I'm not ready to perform right now. I'm like a Ferrari. I'm high maintenance.

I put the hippopotamus to bed.

I'm sort of a softy sometimes. I'm a sensitive dude.

I'm hooking up with this girl, your girl's girl, and your girlfriend's girlfriend's girlfriend. Somebody's gotta do it.

You need to on your tip-top game with your GTL to stay FTD to get the girls to DTF in MIA ... say that 5 times fast.

Ronnie doesn't want to give up his cookie, and that's Sam. You need to give up your cookie, son, so you can go find another one. I'm eatin' chocolate chip cookies every night, dog.

Ronnie is feeding steaming ALPO to Sam, on a plate, 'cause he's doggin' her so much.

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