Two and a Half Men

Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two and a half men

This is a hot divorced mother from the valley, you're going to need three penises and a jumper cable to get her attention.

Charlie

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Two and a Half Men Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 19 Quotes, Charlie Harper Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 19 Quotes

And you call yourself a drummer. Keith Moon is vomitting in his grave.

Charlie

Charlie: Who the hell are you?
Jake: Oh, this is my friend Eldrige, he plays that drums.
Charlie: Okay, that explains the attitude.
Eldridge: What, are you ragging on my name?
Charlie: No, I'm ragging on your instrument, now beat it.

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