Very interesting... What is it, doc? Well, your temperature ...
Doctor: Very interesting...
Mortician: What is it, doc?
Doctor: Well, your temperature is only 55 degrees, you have no pulse, no heartbeat, and your eyes are all puffy and sticky...
Mortician: Oh no! You mean...?
Doctor: Yeah, I'm afraid the two of you have pinkeye.
(The mortician and his assistant both gasp in horror.)
Doctor: I'd give you topical medicine, but I don't wanna touch you.
Assistant: Oh, I'm so hungry, and all I can think about eating is...brains!
Doctor: Yeah, well, for God's sake, don't touch your eyes. I'll prescribe some antibiotics.
Principal Victoria: Good morning there, children. I love the Elvis costume, Chef.
Chef: Elvis? I'm Evel Knievel! Why the hell would I dress up like Elvis??
Principal Victoria: Well, why the hell would you dress up like Evel Knievel?
- Permalink: Good morning there, children. I love the Elvis costume, Chef. ...
Stan: I learned something today. Halloween isn't about costumes or candy. It's about being good to one another and giving and loving.
Kyle: No dude, that's Christmas.
Stan: Oh. Well then what's Halloween about?
kyle: Costumes and candy.
Stan: Oh yeah.
- Permalink: I learned something today. Halloween isn't about costumes or can...