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Blair: We are going to stage a private, intimate moment for Louis to stumble upon. And when he realizes he has nothing to worry about, he'll go back to Paris leaving Louis behind. For me.
Dan: No way.
Blair: I thought you were my friend.
Dan: I am. Which is why I'm going to point out to you what a bad idea this is. For starters, Serena's going to be at this party.
Blair: She's staying with Lily tonight.
Dan: Fine. Then everyone else in the world will be at this party. We'd have to tell Serena.
Blair: Absolutely not. You and I faking a kiss? Do you really want to have that conversation with Serena?
Dan: It can't be half as painful as this one.