You have to be smart to be an assistant. You have to be totally ...

Veronica: You have to be smart to be an assistant. You have to be totally in sync with your magician. Know when to pull the wire, slip him the key, ice his nipples.
Ted: Well, after meeting Kristi, looks like Mordor's gonna have to pick a lock with flaccid nipples.


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Characters:
Ted Crisp, Veronica Palmer
Episode:
Better Off Ted Season 1 Episode 13: "Secrets and Lives"
Show:
Better Off Ted
Related Quotes:
Ted Crisp Quotes, Veronica Palmer Quotes, Better Off Ted Season 1 Episode 13 Quotes, Better Off Ted Quotes
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Better Off Ted Season 1 Episode 13 Quotes

Veronica: Okay, fellas, nerd it up.
Ted: We've been developing a new search engine, and unlike language based search engines, this face-matching technology uses visual recognition...
Veronica: Less nerd, more English.
Phil: You take an image of a person...
Lem: Or "picture."
Phil: And scan it into a computer...
Lem: Or "magic box."
Linda: I'm not embarrassed to say, this is helping.

Linda: So my boyfriend wants us to move in together.
Veronica: Why would he wants us to move in together?
Linda: No, I mean he wants me to move in with him.
Veronica: Then where am I supposed to live?
Linda: You're sabotaging this conversation, aren't you?
Veronica: Just 'til we get to the meeting.

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  2. You have to be smart to be an assistant. You have to be totally ...