Curb Your Enthusiasm - TV Fanatic

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: Start The Violin Music

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 00:55:42 EST

This eighth season was billed as Curb Your Enthusiasm coming to New York.

The show worked Larry leaving for NYC in so hilariously that I overlooked the fact that it took half the season to get him here. And while I was ready to criticize the season for not having an overarching theme to the 10-episode run, "Larry vs. Michael J. Fox" brought the New York era to an end in such a funny and poetic manner that I'm ready to forgive the uneven season.

Back in "The Vow of Silence," Larry broke down and went to New York because he kept using it as an excuse to get out of a charity event. It was such a fitting ending, therefore, to have to do the same thing in order to get out of a Michael J. Fox's charity event in New York. Only in typical Curb fashion, they threw a perfect curve ball in not sending LD back to L.A., but to Paris, where Leon bought himself a chalupa!

And that was the thing about "Larry vs. Michael J. Fox," not only was it constructed beautifully as an episode and as an ender to the season, but it was ridiculously hilarious along the way. I noted more funny moments, and compiled more quips for our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page, than I did for any other episode this season.

The scene in the park would have made the episode a winner all on its own. Between Larry buying Greg a replacement gift even though the flamboyant seven-year old obviously loved his sewing machine, the kid giving Susie a hand-sewn pillow sham with a swastika on it, and Jeff taking a bullet for Susie, the five-minute span made for multiple laugh out loud moments, as well as a number of times to acknowledge the cleverness of it all.

This finale gave us the second straight episode of Hitler's mustache, the elevator blow up, Leon's entire pep talk to LD about taking on Fox, Larry claiming Mr. Parkinson would be appalled at Fox's behavior, and last but certainly not least, Fox thinking Larry was giving him the violin sign for waxing on about his disease.

In fact, every confrontation between Larry and Michael was fantastic. I especially loved not knowing if Fox was actually pissed or if it was indeed Parkinson's. After watching his work here, I'm even more upset that he didn't win for Guest Actor in a Drama Series at this weekend's Creative Arts Emmys.

Now remember to always say "poor bastard" every time Jeff and Susie leave a room, and then tell us how you would have dealt with Larry's major predicaments this week:

The Background Music
LD's Stance: Larry thought that everyone in the restaurant should be quiet while his date was playing the background piano. After she finished a set, he led the entire place in a round of applause.
My Perspective: I don't think this was his actual stance, because he was obviously booty blinded by the lovely Ms. Gasteyer. But I couldn't disagree with LD more here. It's background piano at a place where people are there to have conversation. The music is for the ambiance. And while I don't mind giving the musician a pleasant "nice job," a rousing clap is not necessary.

The Gay Gift
LD's Stance: If a young child acts as flamboyantly as Greg, and notes that he loves Project Runway, then you can absolutely give him a sewing machine as a gift.
My Perspective: I'm with Larry on this one. The kid loved the present, and it was obvious that he would, so why not give it to him? Giving a boy a sewing machine isn't going to make him gay... not that there's anything wrong with that!

Now getting back to my original critique that there wasn't a flow to the season as a whole, the problem is that so many of the best Curb seasons have had that in spades. Most notably, season four had the running arc of Larry preparing to perform in Mel Brooks's The Producers, and season seven featured LD finally doing the Seinfeld reunion while attempting to win Cheryl back.

It can be argued that this season's theme was New York City, but so many episodes had nothing to do with that fact. Having said that…there were a number of all-time great installment during this season’s run, including “Larry vs. Michael J. Fox,” “The Divorce," and "Palestinian Chicken."

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "Larry vs. Michael J. Fox."

Larry: He started a war. He didn't really care for Jews. He thought they were a bit much. | permalink

Larry: Did you shake that up on purpose?
Michael J Fox: Parkinson's. | permalink

Leon: Michael J. Fox bout to be Michael J. f**ked up in a minute. | permalink

Larry: As a cynic it kinda sickens me, but he'd take a bullet for her. | permalink

Larry: You're in Paris, got the best food in the world, you're eating a chalupa?
Leon: If I coulda put French toast in this motha f**ka I would. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: You Bucknered It!

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 00:14:01 EST

In a word, the penultimate episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm's eighth season was... enjoyable. With its therapist blunders, sexual accidents, backwards civil rights activism, and heartwarming Bill Buckner moments, "Mister Softee" was an extremely fun half hour of television.

For my money, Fred Melamed put forth some of the best comedic work of the summer in his small role as Larry's therapist. The subtlety he used in blatantly spilling information on his clients, while acting like he wasn't, was absolutely brilliant. He merely mentioned it was an illustrious director Star Wars that frequented prostitutes. That isn't obvious, right?

When LD's broken car seat came into play with Ana Gasteyer having herself a good time in the passenger seat, I wasn't sure if it was going to go to a funny place. But then Susie came running out of the building and towards Larry's car and the game changed. There have been few things as disgusting and as hilarious as watching Susie in the passenger seat, along with LD's reaction while driving that now gross car.

Everyone loves them some Leon Black, but when he tries to take things to another level, he's even better. Like when he pretended to be Danny Duberstein last season. Leon killed it as a Black man with glasses in this episode. Although we didn't get to listen in on his conversation with the security guard or Dr. Thurgood, imagining what he was saying was still funny.

The highlight of the episode, though, had to be the Bill Buckner story. I had just turned one when Buckner had that little mishap back in the World Series, but that doesn't mean that what happened to him isn't engrained in my mind.

Watching Larry go through a similar situation, only to meet the legend later on was great, but to have them hang out, complete a minion, and then have LD cheering Bill on as the former baseball legend redeemed himself in front of hundreds of people in the streets of New York, it definitely gave me some chills.

Take a second to laugh at the moment when that little girl invented the "pretty, pretty, pretty good" line, and then tell us how you would have dealt with one of Larry's predicaments this week:

The Order Share
LD's Stance: If you and a friend order two things at a restaurant, with the intention to share, you must stick to that deal once the food comes out.
My Perspective: I absolutely agree. That is a verbal agreement that you abide by no matter what. How is it fair that just because Jeff likes the look of the chicken, he gets to keep that all to himself? If you go halvsies, you go halvsies. There's no going back, even if that fish is disgusting.

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "Mister Softee." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Yari: You f*cking Bucknered it! Why is Buckner on my team?!? | permalink

Leon: I get a f*ckin' tingle in my johnson when a motha f*cka tell me he's about to get some ass. | permalink

Larry: I saw this commercial last night, and Michael Jordan had a Hitler moustache.
Buckner: Yeah I saw that. He's the first one to wear that since Hitler. Isn't he? | permalink

Larry: That's a remarkably idiotic thing that you just said but you know, the fact that you're wearing glasses, I perceive it as a little less idiotic than I normally would. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: It Was The One-Armed Man!

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 29 Aug 2011 00:12:35 EST

All of the one-armed man references in "Car Periscope" must have been from The Fugitive because there never actually was a one-armed man in The Mask - even though Jim Carrey so memorably announced It wasn't me. It was the one-armed man! - and Wrongfully Accused featured a one-armed, one-legged, one-eyed man as the villain.

While playing off of The Fugitive for the one-armed man thing certainly ran its course through the 90s, enough time has passed to make it acceptable again, and Curb Your Enthusiasm did a great job of incorporating it into the rest of this week's funny episode. The idea made for plenty of great LD sound bites, but more importantly, it created some of the best Larry-and-Jeff-as-detectives moments there has ever been.

The invention from which this episode got its name proved to be a key factor in allowing those two goons to scour the city for the one-armed man while retro cop movie music played in the background. It wasn't the best Curb episode of the season, but it certainly was different, and that was a nice change.

"Car Periscope" also gave us Larry's way of interpreting a man's integrity, it told us to never try to invent the pool cue skis, and it allowed us all to munch and pee if it becomes necessary.

Most importantly, though, it gave us an ending that brought everything full circle. By incorporating both the one-armedness of Larry's evil opponent and LD himself, as well as the upstreaming of a cab that opened the episode, "Car Periscope" came together extremely well. Add that to all the laughs, and you had a very effective episode of Curb.

Now figure out if you would call a celebrity out for using "coon" in Words With Friends, and then tell us how you would have dealt with Larry's major predicament this week:

The Upstreaming
LD's Stance: There is no upstreaming for cabs. You cannot move up the street to hail a cab if he was there first.
My Perspective: Because I have never lived in an area with a high density of cabs, I had to call in a professional. My friend Larry (ironic, huh?) says that upstreaming is a major problem in NYC, and that it is extremely frowned upon. Typical protocol tends to be to either wait your turn behind the other person, or head back down the street to the next available corner. This makes the most logical sense to me. Any other way, as LD put it, would be "anarchy."

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "Car Periscope." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Larry: He's gonna change your life. And a life that sorely needs changing. | permalink

Larry: I am going to go do something nice, right now.
Susie: It's about time. | permalink

Larry: I didn't beat him. The one-armed man did it! | permalink

Larry: I like to munch and pee. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: A Bow Is A Bow

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 00:14:46 EST

While there have been a couple of major bright spots, this season of Curb Your Enthusiasm has been a bit of a disappointment. This was never more obvious than with "The Bi-Sexual," maybe one of my least favorite episodes of Curb ever.

Larry failed to get into a single argument that was in need of analysis, there were very few laughable moments, and the attempt to tie the ending into the rest of the story was foolish.

Worst of all, though, was the fact that the entire episode was basically a forum to compare Viagra and sex to PEDs and baseball. It was so obvious that it became less and less funny every time a new joke was used, which was non-stop over the course of the half hour.

The fact that the entire thing was happening at the same time that Larry, Jeff and Rosie were playing softball? That just made it seem even more contrived.

Other than the Japanese tourist calling out the Japanese restaurant owner for his "shit bow," the only thing that saved this episode was the man, the myth, the legend... Leon Black.

Between him showing up in NYC in Larry's beat up car, the fact that he took in a roommate at Larry's house in L.A., announcing to New York that he was there, and having a croissant filled with mother effing champagne, Leon was his usual hilarious self.

I'm certainly glad that Leon has made his way to the Big Apple, but will it be enough to save the season as we head down the home stretch? There are only three episodes to go. Let's hope they're less like this one and more like "Palestinian Chicken."

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "The Bi-Sexual." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Rosie: You know what a lesbian brings on a second date? A U-Haul. | permalink

Larry: Tie goes to the hetero. | permalink

Larry: Lesbians have kind of an advantage in a way.
Leon: They some tricky mother f**kers. | permalink

Leon: I'm livin' large. I just had a croissant filled with mother f**king champagne. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: The Long Laces

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 00:52:14 EST

"The Hero" was another classic episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm with a fantastic ending that I definitely did not see coming. It was so rewarding to see LD have such a heroic moment on that subway that the thought of him getting his long laces stuck in the door never cross my mind for a second.

I didn't see the long laces coming back into play at the very end, because they had already made a return earlier in the episode. Stupid Hank, who was so tremendously played by SNL veteran Chris Parnell, tripped on his own laces, which caused the wine spill on Ricky Gervais and Donna to break up with Larry, creating a domino effect for the rest of the events of the episode, as Curb does so well.

Before even hearing the news that Curb was making its way to New York for season eight, it broke that Gervais would be appearing, and I got all excited. If this is the only episode he appears in, it will be disappointing, but at the same time I'm not sure I could take much more of him in this context. As interesting a dynamic that Larry and Ricky created, I don't think they meshed together all that well.

Speaking of the Extras star, why do celebs agree to come on to Curb as themselves and be absolute fools? I know they're only versions of themselves, but how does Ricky not come off as a complete jerk here. At least Larry is a lovable jerk, whereas Ricky was a snob who buys expensive wine as a gift, brings his own DVD to a party, makes Larry pay for the gifted tickets, can't admit he's seeing Donna, and cries at the burglar. Sure I'll do this, but rename my character Dicky Pervais.

On the very bright side of "The Hero" we witnessed Larry commenting on his own flirting abilities, the entire Broadway whispering incident, what I think may have been the first stare down of the season, and LD singing "I've Been Working on the Railroad" while flossing in an airplane bathroom.

Now decide whether you'd rather act "coachy" or "first classy," and then tell us how you would have dealt with Larry's predicaments this week:

The Gift
LD's stance: This is a two-parter. First Larry felt that if you give someone a gift at a restaurant, it was impolite of Ricky to order such an expensive bottle of wine. Then it was of his opinion that if someone offers you a gift of tickets, they are not expecting you to then pay for those tickets when you go to pick them up at the box office.
My Perspective: Oh Larry is absolutely correct on both accounts! This reaffirms how moronic Ricky Gervais was in this episode. If you are offered a gift of a bottle of wine, you look over the prices, and make a choice that is someone near the middle, but closer to the cheaper end. Ricky's explanation that looking at the price ruins the gift is ludicrous. Then if you are giving someone a gift of tickets, you have to tell them ahead of time that they will have to pay for them. If that would have been the case, I know that both LD and myself would have just said "No thanks pal."

The Restaurant Revolution
LD's Stance: If the waiter is taking too long to bring you your food that you can see is waiting for pickup, it is okay to go grab it yourself.
My Perspective: While I would always be too afraid to pull off this move, I'm not hating on Larry for it. If the waiter's job isn't a priority, then taking the initiative yourself is okay in my book. As a passive aggressive, I would just leave a really poor tip, but different strokes for different folks. Regardless, the waiter's argument is moot these days, because the waiters don't even bring you your food anymore. It is always someone else bringing out the food. All the waiters do it seems like is take your order and bring it back to the kitchen. Are the plates too hot for their delicate hands? Are they too busy taking the other three orders in their section? I'm not sure why this is happening, but it needs to stop.

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "The Hero." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Waiter: I am the waiter.
Larry: Yet we were the ones waiting, so we became the waiters.
Jeff: This man's a hero. He just revolutionized the way restaurants work my friend. No one's gonna go hungry again. | permalink

Susie: Don't impose your desires on my whole cuisine. | permalink

Hank (to Larry): When I first saw you, I guessed you for a Spaniard. I'm glad you're not Spanish. I'm not a fan of the Spanish. | permalink

Hank: I don't even know how to write cursive anymore. | permalink

Susie: Ya know Larry, I think you're taking the wrong tactic with these women. I really do. I think you have to present who you reall are.
Larry: I did present who I really was; a phony, a fraud, a prevaricator. I presented who I was. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: The Lunch Confirmation

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 00:09:23 EST

Larry David will do almost anything with the correct amount of motivation. In "Vow of Silence." he touched Susie's disgusting snot napkin so she wouldn't see the eaten Pinkberry in the garbage, and then embarked on a three-month visit to New York with the sole purpose of missing Tessler's event for challenged children.

Everyone has been waiting to see how LD and the crew were going to make it to the Big Apple in this highly touted "New York Season." How many of you had "Larry's going to just head there in order to miss a commitment?" Well, a good percentage probably, because LD is a pretty big jerk.

In addition to finally getting the New York part of the season underway, "Vow of Silence" was just as funny as ever.

First. there was the original chat and cut, which Larry so nicely called the woman out for. By the way, only LD can call someone out for such a thing, and then so calmly compliment her on it. Then there was the subsequent phantom chat and cut that the customers at Pinkberry claimed Larry was trying to pull, which forced him directly into Tessler's line of sight. Poor LD.

In typical Curb fashion, they spent a good two to three hilarious minutes of run time on Larry and Jeff fighting about who had eaten more of Oscar's Pinkberry. Of course, that led to them finishing the entire thing, along with Susie's sob fest.

The entire fake conversation that Jeff and Larry were having with the mouthing Vance in order to save their butts was fantastic, especially when Jeff was pretending that Vance was talking about a helicopter ride. Good job, Mr. Greene.

Throw yourself a going away party, and then tell us how you would have dealt with Larry's predicaments this week:

The Vow of Silence
LD's Stance: Vance's vow of silence was ludicrous because he was still mouthing words in an attempt to communicate.
My Perspective: I am not a spiritual man, and I don't know if that will make a difference in this case, but I take Vance's vow for its words. I think he's in the right here. It is a vow of SILENCE. It's not a vow of NO COMMUNICATION. If he wants to incoherently mouth words to people, have it at it, big guy. Just be aware, people are going to make fun of you for it.

The Confirmation
LD's Stance: If you make plans with someone, no confirmation needs to be made in order for both parties to show up to the aforementioned plans.
My Perspective: I am with Larry on this one. Lewis is ridiculous if he needs a confirmation for lunch. If you make plans to have lunch, you go have lunch. If I call to cancel, then you can stay home and not shower, Richard.

Hilariously, the confirmation problem ended up coming back up at the very end of the episode, as Larry's decision to head to New York left Richard alone at the restaurant. What made this final scene work so well was that it was such a minute part of the episode. It was a great callback, but because it was calling back to a short conversation LD and Richard had during the middle of the episode, I definitely didn't see it coming.

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "Vow of Silence." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Susie: You know what the best thing about going to New York is? I'm not gonna see your face for three months. | permalink

Larry: There's plenty of Pinkberry's. I bet you there's a couple of decent ones near a prison. | permalink

Richard: What the f**k is that? He's like a mime or some s**t? | permalink

Jeff: What do you mean you want a helicopter ride? | permalink

Larry: For a guy who can't talk, he has a pretty big mouth. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: The Two Year Window

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 01 Aug 2011 00:40:36 EST

"The Smiley Face" was definitely not the best episode in the early part of season eight, but Curb Your Enthusiasm is always reliable for at least a few laughs.

There was Larry claiming that he was the Edmund Hillary of shitting where you eat. We witnessed LD go nuts on Harry Hamlin, which led to the most bizarrely funny lines of the night: "Chocolate pretzels? Get the hell outta here!" And of course, there was the variety of awkward moments that took place at the funeral service, including Lar walking around with the titular smiley face on his head.

But, at the end of the day, it didn't have nearly as many ridiculous antics as "The Divorce" or "Palestinian Chicken," and it didn't come together quite as nicely as "The Safe House." A funny half hour indeed, but Curb is often done better.

Remember to never give away a cabinet, and then tell us how you would have dealt with Larry's predicaments this week:

The 60 Dollars
LD's Stance: If you give someone money for something specific and that event never occurs, said person should return the money.
My Perspective: Larry is right on the MONEY with this one (of course the pun is intended). Especially with a relationship in such early stages, there is no way Heidi shouldn't have given the money back. I wouldn't have waited as long as LD to ask for it, though. First second I saw her, it's just a casual "Can I get my cash back?"

The Kiss and Talk
LD's Stance: Making out and chatting at the same time is perfectly fine.
My Perspective: No way! If you are doing a couple of closed mouth kisses here and there during a conversation that is one thing, but if you are trying to chit chat while making out, you have another thing coming, my friend. Once you are in the zone, there's no coming back out to talk about things.

The Two Year Window
LD's Stance: Once a family member has been dead for two years, there is no need to say "I'm sorry" when hearing about it.
My Perspective: While I agree with him in principle, I don't agree with it in practice. Each person grieves differently. If someone I was that close to died, I'd probably want an "I'm sorry" for the rest of my life. Others would be okay after a couple of years. Whatever the case may be, everybody deserves a nice comment in the situation, although LD's response of "hah" was definitely the funniest choice.

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "The Smiley Face." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Larry: You know I talk during intercourse too. | permalink

Larry: I will be the Edmund Hillary of s**tting wear you eat. | permalink

Larry: That's a long time for sorrys. That's like saying Happy New Year in October. | permalink

Guy: You've got something on your head.
Larry: I believe they refer to that as a smiley face. They're frequently used by idiots at the end of emails and text messages, such as "I miss you ...smiley face." | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: The Social Assassin

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Sun, 24 Jul 2011 22:30:00 EST

"Palestinian Chicken" would have been an instant classic if all that happened was that the show faded in to the discussion where Jeff labeled Larry a social assassin, and then it faded out.

If memory serves me, nobody on Curb has ever given LD a name for what he does so well. Like the no-balled Ron told him after the fabulous dinner party scene, Larry "says what everyone's thinking. [He] just comes out with it. It's impressive." I love that people on the sitcom have finally come to grips with how talented Larry really is.

Would you ever tell Janice from Friends that it's annoying when she says LOL at something funny? I doubt it. How about explaining to Susie Greene that nobody can stand it when she goes "ahhhhh" after every sip she takes? I would rather hide in a corner than confront her like that, but that's what LD does, and it's about time he was recognized for it.

The other side of "Palestinian Chicken" was just that, the Palestinian chicken that apparently was the best thing in the entire world. A couple of Jewish people eating at a place like that made for a bunch of humorous moments, highlighted by LD and Jeff getting cheered by the patrons after shoving Funkhouser away for wanting to wear his yarmulke inside.

It also created the ever-awkward moment when Funkhouser heard Larry having sex with Shara, who yelled out "f*ck me you Jew bastard!" It was quite hilarious to LD, and to much of the audience I'm sure, but the Big Funk wasn't too happy about, which was probably the funniest part of the whole thing.

After you decide which side Larry ended up choosing, his Jewish friends or the best sex of his life, help us decide if LD handled the situations below correctly:

The Adult Dinner Party
LD's Stance: He felt that the teenager shouldn't have been at the party to begin with, but if she's going to be there, she can listen to a dirty joke.
My Perspective: I really feel this depends on the group of adults, and just how old the child is, but a dinner party like that really felt like no kids allowed. I'm not as crude as Larry, so the idea to tell a dirty joke wouldn't really come to mind, but if it did, it would not be happening with a young teenage girl at the table. I understand it's probably mild to what she hears at high school, but that's not the point. Did it make for a hilariously awkward dinner, though? Yes. Point, Curb.

The No Matter What
LD's Stance: If someone goes out of their way to tell you not to let something happen no matter what, you adhere by that. That is, unless the results can benefit you greatly.
My Perspective: I'm with Larry on this one all the way. What's the point of listening to people's requests if you are just going to go against them half an hour later? Juliet said don't let her eat cake no matter what, and I would have been right there with him wrestling it away from her. We have a different story with the Rabbi because LD needed her to let the Big Funk play golf, so using his "no matter what" stance to trade chicken for a golf championship was okay in my book. Then again, Sammy ended up ruining everything on the 17th hole, which made everything else that much funnier.

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "Palestinian Chicken." Don’t forget to check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Jeff: He has no balls. I have a solid single ball. | permalink

Juliet: How are the potatoes?
Larry: Actually, the potatoes are a little cold. | permalink

Funkhouser: She's an adult when she turns 13 or learns to make her first latkes. | permalink

Jeff: You know what you are? You're a social assassin. | permalink

Larry: You really are your mother's daughter, aren't you?
Sammy: Yeah. Now get the f*ck out my driveway you bald prick. | permalink

Larry: I know we have our problems with these people, but man oh man, do they know what they're doing, chicken wise. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Review: The Burlesque Dermatologist

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 01:22:30 EST

What Larry David perfected on Seinfeld, and continues to excel at on Curb Your Enthusiasm, is bringing multiple story arcs full circle. "The Safe House" was a perfect example. It went above and beyond, bringing each plot line conclusion to the forefront within the final five minutes.

The numerous stories included Larry reaching behind the women for the ice cream, Richard Lewis dating a burlesque dancer for her breasts, watching over the stranger's laptop, the battered women living down the street from Larry and racial profiling.

In one of the final scenes, we witnessed Richard pulling the exact same freezer move that LD did. Of course, with Dale there instead of the house mother, Richard was in for a much more harmful fate, which led to the lack of a Breast Blowout on Lewis' last night of pleasure with the Double D's.

The other three plots came together so nicely, beginning with Larry's fall leading him to accidentally admit that Leon was abusing him. That, in turn, ended up harming the African-American who returned the computer he was supposed to be watching for Larry because the cops showed up looking for the harmful Leon. The police, like everyone else on this show apparently, couldn't tell the difference between the African-American Leon and the African-American with the laptop. Full circle.

Of course, Curb is hilarious for reasons aside from structure.

"The Safe House" gave us plenty of one-liners and ad-libbing. Between Larry admitting Lewis would be the one to drive him to suicide, Funkhouser wanting to do a hands in after they all decided to go watch Richard's girlfriend dance, and Leon telling Larry that he knows all of his security codes, there was plenty to get caught up in over the half hour. And only Larry David would go to a strip club to check the women for moles!

Like we will be doing all season here at TV Fanatic, let's now take a look at some of the arguments LD got himself into this week, and see how we might have handled the situations...

The Chubby Hubby
LD's Stance: Ask the women at the freezer to move aside, and then reach in behind them. Later, comment that they should have serious conversations in a different aisle.
My Perspective: I am all for asking them to please step aside, but in real life they would have done so without you having to ask. If they did not, there is nothing wrong with reaching behind them. I do disagree with LD's idea that they should move their serious convo to another aisle. All they really need to do is keep these moments to the middle of the aisle. You won't impede another shopper's progress that way. Grocery stores take place on the edges.

The Laptop
LD's Stance: He decided to watch the computer for the stranger until he had to leave and then asked someone else to do the same for him.
My Perspective: Absolutely not. Yes, agreeing to watch the laptop for a few minutes is fine. Once you have to depart, you definitely do not leave it in the hands of another stranger. You bring that laptop up to a manager of the store. If it is something much less expensive, fine, but anything over $100 in value, you bring to someone you know is a professional. When the original stranger comes back and doesn't see his computer, he will immediately look for the manager. The other option I could agree with is to take it with you yourself (if you can look up the individual's contact information on the computer itself).

The Dog Dump
LD's Stance: When an individual lets his dog dump in your yard, you have every right to yell at him and there is no need to apologize for that.
My Perspective: I am right with LD on this one. I am not a dog owner, so I have much less wiggle room than most on this situation. This is something that both the dog and the owner of said dog deserve a good screaming at for. Once? Fine. But three times? No way.

As always, here are some of our favorite quotes from "The Safe House." Check out all the best one-liners at our Curb Your Enthusiasm quotes page.

Funkhouser: Have you set a day aside when you're gonna finally look at her face? | permalink

Funkhouser: We ought to do this more often.
Larry: Come to disgusting strip clubs? | permalink

Richard: How did you see a small mole from where you were sitting?
Larry: Well I have breast vision. | permalink

Woman: Do you want to apologize to my dog? Because you really yelled at my dog.
Larry: Yeah, it's very hard to apologize to a dog because they're a stupid animal. | permalink

Larry: I have no problem with crying in a grocery store. I would suggest, however, the next time you feel overwhelmed by something, to go to a different section. | permalink

Man: So you think all Black people look alike?
Larry: I think all computers look alike. | permalink

Curb Your Enthusiasm Season 8 Premiere Review: Dodger Blues

d4cella@gmail.com (Dan Forcella) — Mon, 11 Jul 2011 00:43:06 EST

Curb Your Enthusiasm returned on the air after quite a long hiatus - and the season eight premiere proved why it is one of the best comedies on television.

"The Divorce" picked up right where “Seinfeld” left off, and neither the show nor Larry David skipped a beat.

It was awkward. It was funny. It made you question LD’s life. It was Curb, and it was fantastic! I love that they tore Larry and Cheryl apart so quickly at the start of the episode, and through the magic of time jumping, got them all the way through a divorce by the end of the 30 minutes.

Between Larry’s statement that he can call other bald guys “baldy” because it’s like black people calling each other the N word, Susie ripping Jeff a new one for even thinking she wouldn’t take him for all he’s worth if they ever got divorced, and Leon recommending Funkhouser put “Just Divorced” on the back of his car, the laughs didn’t stop.

Here at the TV Fanatic, we will be looking at many of the ridiculous situations Larry David gets himself into week after week. Check out are three from “The Divorce.” Be sure to weigh in on how you think LD handled the problem, and how you would react in the same spot:

The Buffet
LD’s Stance: Larry thought that since he gets “all he can eat” that he can share with everyone and anyone at his table.
My Perspective: Absolutely no way! Although it may be legal according to Larry’s terrible new lawyer, it is in no way proper to do at a buffet. When you order a meal at a restaurant, it's fine if you want to share some of it with others at your table, but when you order from an “All You Can Eat” buffet, you are forfeiting all rights to help your fellow eaters out. That is why you always order from the buffet if it has anything on it that you want.

Girl Scout Cookies
LD’s Stance: Larry thought that since he had not yet paid for his girl scout cookies, he did not need to go through with the payment for them once he lost the Dodger tickets.
My Perspective: I’m with him on this one. No matter what his reason was for ordering the cookies... if he hadn’t already paid for them, there is definitely no requirement to go through with the transaction. Having said that, if I were in that situation with those nice little girls, I would have given in and paid in a heartbeat.

The First Time
LD’s Stance: When Kiera got her first period, Larry thought it was a great idea to run upstairs and get one of Cheryl’s tampons to help the girl out. He then decided to walk her through the process, step-by-step!
My Perspective: That is something only a woman should be helping a young girl with. If you're basically a stranger, like LD was in this situation, you immediately call the woman that can get to your house the fastest so that she can help out. Curb is always great with awkward, but that scene was so uncomfortable it ceased to be funny.

Of course, there are plenty of great quotes from LD and friends, so here are some of our favorites from “The Divorce," and don't forget to check out the Curb Your Enthusiasm Quotes page for more. What was your favorite moment of the season eight premiere? And aren’t you glad to have Larry back in your life?

Larry: You should have recused yourself. We can't go up against each other. It's in the code. The bald code. | permalink

Susie: What are you f**king kidding me? You think we're gonna have a nice divorce if we ever get divorced. No f**king way. I'm taking you for everything you have Mister. I'm taking your balls, and I'm thumbtacking them to the wall. | permalink

Kiera: Do you like girl scout cookies?
Larry: I find them abhorrent, but come in. | permalink

Larry: Why don't you get a divorce?
Funkhouser: I'm too lazy. | permalink

Larry: First of all, I commend you on the demographics. A Black, an Asian, and are you a Jew per chance? | permalink

Larry: I got a Swede lawyer?!? She's gonna get everything! | permalink