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That's all Richard Webber has to say about Addison Montgomery's presence (or lack thereof) at Seattle Grace Hospital. At a personal breaking point, the renowned neonatal surgeon taken a leave of absence from her employer and is cruising down California's Pacific Coast Highway in a classic red convertible when we first see her.
When Addison arrives in L.A., stop #1 is Oceanside Wellness Center, where she gets in the elevator along with a hot guy gets in with her. Naturally, she bursts out laughing uncontrollably and explains to him how back where she's from, in Seattle, elevators make people horny.
The gentleman, who we soon learn is alternative medicine specialist Peter "Pete" Finch, thinks she's hot... albeit possibly insane.
But she's not in town to talk about horny elevators in Seattle... and least not entirely. Addison made the trip to see her old friend, Naomi Bennett, from medical school. Addison gets a lot of flak for not staying in touch, and is shocked to learn that Naomi - just like her - is recently divorced from her hot, successful doctor husband, Sam.
And, like Addison and Derek Shepherd at Seattle Grace, Sam works right along side Naomi at the Oceanside clinic.
Addison confides to Naomi that her SoCal journey is not just to rekindle old friendships, but to get pregnant. She wants a baby, and Naomi happens to be a renowned fertility specialist. It's just a matter of picking out the sperm donor and Addison is ready to embark on the amazing journey we call as motherhood.
She soon meets the rest of the staff at the Oceanside Wellness Center, an eccentric but friendly group. In addition to Sam (also her old friend), Naomi and Pete, there's...
These people have issues, but that's old hat to a Seattle Grace physician.
Speaking of crazy ensembles, a pregnant woman, Lisa, shows up with a group of five people. Lisa was artificially inseminated as a surrogate mother for another woman, Carol. Lisa slept with Carol's husband after undergoing the procedure, though - as well as with her ex-husband... and another guy. A case like that makes determining paternity a problem.
The bigger problem, though, is that Lisa hasn't received prenatal care. As Addison examines her, she learns she has a life-threatening condition, for both her and the baby. Lisa takes comfort in the visiting doc's care and asks her to stay in Los Angeles until she delivers the child.
Addison agrees, but soon after, receives a devastating blow in learning that her own odds of becoming pregnant via artificial insemination are virtually non-existent. For Addison, a baby is about changing her life - taking control, revitalizing herself. When she gets the news, she falls apart, spiraling into a depressed, confused mess.
It's a good thing Naomi and Violet show Addison how to get over their bad moods at work - by waiting in the lobby until 12:55, when Dell rolls out with his surfboard (and washboard abs), ready to hit the beach. Hey, so what if he's old enough to be their kid. The ladies ogle away with joy.
Later, Addison and Pete begin flirting, despite her cracks at his specialty in herbal remedies. He tells Addison to lie down so he can prove he’s not a quack. Addison is skeptical about the acupuncture he gives her, saying that there is no way it’s going to release her tension and lead to a rush of emotions, as Pete claims.
A few minutes later, she’s got needles in her face and is sobbing and proclaiming that she hates L.A. and everything about her life.
Lisa goes into labor and is rushed to the hospital. They deliver the baby safely, but something in Lisa’s uterus ruptures. Addison saves her, but becomes livid with the gaggle of possible parents, who all want to know what the paternity test turned up, rather than if Lisa's okay.
Later, Lisa gives the baby to Carol and Doug, which seems to be the right choice, though the paternity of the child is never revealed.
The doctors comment on how this baby will have two moms and three dads, and unconventional as it might seem, they all look like a family. Sam touches Naomi’s arm. He was never unfaithful to her. He just woke up one day and decided he couldn’t be married to her anymore. But now he's very clearly regretting that decision.
After everything she's been through from Seattle to L.A., Addison has yet another breakdown, and is found by Pete as she's crying in the stairwell.
She tells him he’s not allowed to flirt with her, as she is all dried up and past her prime. Pete begs to differ. “I’m gonna kiss you. I’m gonna kiss you with tongue," he says. "I’m gonna kiss you so you feel it.”
They share a steamy embrace, which he says was to remind her that she’s not all dried up. He departs, leaving her breathless and.
As Addison heads home to Seattle, she does so with an invite from Naomi to come back and fill that empty office they've got there at Oceanside. The wonderful Dr. Montgomery may be driving back to Seattle in her sexy red convertible for now, but she's already found her new life in California, and it's only a matter of time until she returns.