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South Park Quotes

Mr. Garrison Sr.: Would you have sex with your son to save his life?
Man at bar 1: Oh, this is one of them scruples questions ain't it?
Man at bar 2: No, no I got a better one: Would you have sex with your motherto save your father's life?
Man at bar 1: You mean like if someone had a gun to your father's head and said if you don't have sex with her, I'll kill him?
Bartender: If a killer put a knife to my throat and said "have sex with your mother or I'm gonna kill your father while having sex with you, I would have sex with myself.

Mr. Garrison: Who knows what a can food drive is?
Cartman: Isn't that where they cut open a chick's stomach to get the baby out?
Mr. Garrison: No, that's a caesarian section, Eric, but remember there are no stupid questions, just stupid people.