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Michael stomps, pouts and cries when someone other than him plays Santa at the branch Christmas party. Phyllis, specifically.

He then casts himself Jesus and mocks the secret Santa exchange through the karaoke microphone.

Because he got shut down and no one was buying his Jesus act (except Angela, a little), he called David Wallace to whine - and found out that Dunder Mifflin is being bought and the new owners are cleaning house - at least at corporate.

Naturally, this is info that's not supposed to be shared, but he assumes if the execs are being sacked, then everyone else is too. Jim notes that being bought isn't the same as going under, but Michael is unconvinced.

Michael gets Wallace back on speakerphone, where ge informs the whole branch that the new owners are buying Dunder Mifflin for its distribution network, and that they are the only thing about this company that works.

So the branch is saved! Crisis averted!

Elsewhere, Dwight tried to figure out what his piece-at-a-time gift was, Andy and Erin continued to talk past each other and Pam tried to set Oscar up with Matt the warehouse guy.

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The Office Season 6 Episode 13 Quotes

If this were Russia, yeah sure. Everyone would go to one Santa, and there would be a line around the block and once you sat on her lap and she'd ask you what you wanted, you would say probably "freedom." At which point the KGB would arrest you and send you to Siberia. It's a good thing Russia doesn't exist anymore.


Ho ho ho! Why pay more to sit next to old Tranny Claus over there, when you can sit on my lap. Phyllis is only ... pretending to be a man, I'm the real thing. Sit down on my lap and there will be no doubt! [awkward silence] No it's not, not like penis-wise.