The Simpsons Season 18

"You Kent Always Say What You Want"

Homer wins a contest and is featured on Kent Brockman's nightly news program. However, the interview turns into trouble when Brockman blurts a horrible word on live TV.

"24 Minutes"

When finding out Jimbo, Dolph, and Kearney plan on sabotaging Springfield Elementary School's annual bake sale, Bart and Lisa enlist the help of Jack Bauer and Chloe O'Brian.

"Stop or My Dog Will Shoot"

When Homer gets lost in a cornfield maze, Santa's Little Helper rescues him and becomes a hero, which prompts the family to enroll him in Police Dog Academy, which they later regret.

"Crook and Ladder"

When reading a parenting magazine, Marge throws away Maggie's pacifier. However, when the pacifier is thrown in the trash, Maggie goes on a path of destruction.

"The Boys of Bummer"

Bart becomes a hometown hero when he makes the game-winning catch at his Little League game, sending the Springfield Isotots to the Little League championship for the first time.

"Marge Gamer"

Marge discovers the wonders of the Internet via a reality game called "Earthland Realms" where she discovers Bart is the game's best and most destructive player.

"Homerazzi"

After the family photo album is destroyed, Marge restages all of the family's photographs and a celebrity dating scandal is captured in the background, striking tabloid gold.

"Rome-old and Juli-eh"

In an unexpected turn of events, Grampa and Selma fall in love and get married, prompting Homer and Patty plot to break up their love connection.

"Yokel Chords"

After Lisa protests denying education to Cletus's kids, Principal Skinner offers her a chance to tutor them herself, though Krusty hires them as a musical act for his show. Meanwhile, Bart ends up in therapy after scaring his peers with stories of a school chef notorious for cooking children.

"Springfield Up"

Declan Desmond returns as he shows a documentary about Springfield's current adult population as children, discussing their future aspirations.

"Little Big Girl"

Cletus ineptly tosses his pipe, Springfield is in danger when the town is about to be hit by a fire, Bart unwittingly saves the day and is rewarded with a driver's license.

"Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times"

Homer's misguided revenge on the Rich Texan combined with an untimely car break down leaves Marge, Lisa, and Bart to tell three tales about revenge gone wrong.

"The Wife Aquatic"

After viewing one of Patty and Selma's home video of their summer on the boardwalk, Marge reminisces of her memorable childhood vacations spent at Barnacle Bay.

"Kill Gil, Volumes I & II"

After Gil Gunderson gives Lisa a Malibu Stacy doll reserved for Mr. Costington's daughter, he gets fired as a mall Santa and moves in with the Simpsons.

"The Haw-Hawed Couple"

Bart becomes Nelson's best friend, and discovers how possessive Nelson can be. Meanwhile, Homer finds himself hooked on one of Lisa's fantasy books.

"Ice Cream of Margie (with the Light Blue Hair)"

After Homer gets fired once again from the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant, he takes over Springfield's ice cream truck business after his favorite driver dies.

"Moe'N'a Lisa"

Lisa discovers that Moe's written rantings are perfect fodder for poetry, but at a writer's convention, Moe ends up taking the credit.

"G.I. (Annoyed Grunt)"

Homer finds himself in an army training camp after trying to get his children out of an agreement to join by age 18.

"Treehouse of Horror XVII"

The Simpsons' annual Halloween hodgepodge. Phil McGraw, Richard Lewis, Fran Drescher, Sir Mix-a-lot and Maurice LaMarche guest star.

"Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em"

After buying Homer a collection of handyman's books, Marge becomes a handywoman, but uses Homer since no one in town is thrilled over the idea of a female carpenter.

"Jazzy and the Pussycats"

Bart gets a drum kit to work out his aggression. Lisa adopts animals to combat depression when Bart is chosen over Lisa to be a member of Lisa's favorite jazz band.

"The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer"

Lisa becomes friends with Fat Tony's son Michael. The Simpsons are invited over for dinner, where Fat Tony is shot and Homer becomes Springfield's new mob boss.

Show:
The Simpsons
Season:
18
Air Dates:
to
Total Episodes:
22

The Simpsons Season 18 Quotes

(On the way to school, Otto stops the bus and offers Metallica a ride; their tour bus has broken down.)
Otto: So what are you waiting for? Hop in.
James Hetfield: (Chuckles) Hop in what?
(The school bus peels away with Bart at the wheel.)
Bart: Look at me, I'm Otto! I'm a hundred years old and I drive a school bus!
Otto: Oh, man. Maybe me and Metallica can go splitsies on a cab.
(Hans Moleman slowly drives by in a pickup truck, with Metallica and their gear in the bed of the truck.)
Kirk Hammett: Hey, loser, we got a ride from a real fan!
Hans Moleman: I used to sleep with Lars' grandmother.
Robert Trujillo: Never listen to our music again!
(Hans Moleman pulls away as Metallica plays an instrumental from the song, "Master of Puppets.")

Wow, your paintings have brush marks. (Gasps) And your statues have weiners!

</i> Homer