Melrose Place Review: "Ocean"

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Heather Locklear arrives on Melrose Place next week, and all we have to say is: Thank goodness!

The show has dragged for weeks now. No storyline stands out, largely due to the fact that Sydney's murder is no longer a mystery, due to the firing of Colin Egglesfield and Ashlee "I Suck!" Simpson.

On last night's installment - titled "Ocean" and recapped in detail on TV Fanatic - David made a move on Lauren and Jonah made amends with Riley.

Before doing so, however, he turned down the advances of Ella, which was dumb for two reasons:

  1. Has he looked at Ella Simms?!?
  2. This is why we watch Melrose Place: for tawdry sex and immoral actions. Jonah going home to Riley instead of to a hotel with Ella isn't sweet and romantic; it's boring and lame.
Ella and Jonah Pic

At least we got to see the old, manipulative Michael Mancini back in action. That's always a welcome sight.

So is any sort of character development, which we've sort of gotten with David. His crush on Lauren was actually believable; though, again, wouldn't it be more fun to watch her juggle a new boyfriend and a set of sex-crazed clients, as opposed to making the rational decision to rebuke David's advances?

We hope Amanda brings the drama next week. There's little doubt she will.

As always, there were a few choice Melrose Place quotes from the night at least:

Ella: Nothing about you is normal, and everything about Riley is normal. Painfully normal! | permalink
Violet: Either get me a lawyer, or I get you divorced. | permalink
Michael: There's a long list of students that would give their right arm for your spot. Don't blow it. | permalink
Ella: What would a boy do without his balls? | permalink

Matt Richenthal is the Editor in Chief of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Twitter and on Google+.

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Melrose Place Season 1 Episode 9 Quotes

Too bad in real life there's no undo command.


Riley: Where are we Jonah?
Jonah: I have no idea.

Melrose Place Season 1 Episode 9 Music

  Song Artist
Powerless Powerless Kristinia Debarge iTunes
Song Jook It Drew Sidora
Pop art blue Pop Art Blue Zero 7 iTunes