Gossip Girl Round Table: "The Debarted"

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As our The Debarted" include classic quotes and performances, devious moves by van der Bilts, and future developments ...


1. What was your favorite Gossip Girl quote from the episode?

DANdy: Lily comparing Serena to Rielle Hunter. I imagine under five percent of viewers understood that reference, but I was among them - and I laughed and laughed.

Gossip Guy: As much as I want to be sappy and give it to one of the dramatic Chuck and Blair lines, I have to go with a funny one. Definitely Blair's disgust over Chuck's real estate deal: "This is a homeless shelter. A. gross, and B. really?"l

Mister Meester: It was a three-way tie for me this week: That heartwarming Chair moment, the unintentional comedy Serena saying she "risked everything for Tripp" (what that means is anyone's guess), and for pure LOL comedy, Lily's Rielle Hunter reference. Though for it to be even more appropriate, Serena would have to get pregnant and Maureen would have cancer. Get on it, Stephanie Savage!

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2. Whose performance was your favorite last night: Ed Westwick, Leighton Meester, Blake Lively or Chace Crawford?

DANdy: Chace emoted a couple times. Impressive stuff from him, indeed. But Ed Westwick does despair like Rielle Hunter did John Edwards.

Gossip Guy: Seriously? If both everyone on the Round Table and the Emmys don't unanimously agree on Ed Westwick I'd be shocked. However, if there's an award for most improved, it goes to Chace.

Mister Meester: All were terrific, and Chace deserves a special mention for his best story line and performance to date, but Ed may have even topped his Dark Knight performance in last year's "O Brother, Where Bart Thou?" with the inner turmoil he showed last night. Fitting that Bart again played a huge role.

3. Will Rufus revenge-cheat on Lily?

DANdy: No. He'll be too busy trying to find a job in this economy.

Mister Meester: I can't see Rufus actually closing the deal with one of those Upper East Side trophy wives, but he definitely wants attention, and he's going to want Lily to know about it. I just hope these two make it in the end.

Gossip Guy: I don't think Rufus has a mean bone in his body... or even a backbone at this point. What the hell happened to the bad ass lead singer of Lincoln Hawk? I can't wait to watch the VH1 special of where are they now... at co-op meetings with the other trophy wives. Lame. I might be changing my icon on here...

4. You're-going-to-hell move of the night: Tripp leaving Serena in the car to save his reputation, or Maureen giving Rufus the letter out of pure spite?

Gossip Guy: Oh absolutely Tripp. What a scum bag. But kudos for Nate just laying out his douche of a cousin. And more kudos for Nate for calling Dan's competition a douche. Man, this guy is so quickly gone from being my least favorite character to second favorite. There can be only one Chuck.

DANdy: Maureen's maneuver. Far be it for me to defend Tripp, but if he truly believes his presence in office serves the greater good, the congressman at least has an excuse. Maureen is just a cold-hearted bitch.

Mister Meester: Maureen. Tripp sucks, but he likely made a snap decision there. Not like the calculating b!tch Maureen, who decided to wreck the lives of Serena, Rufus and Lily even after Tripp gave her what she wanted.

Serena Hospitalized!

Serena and Nate did not maul each other right there in the hospital - to the dismay of one of our Round Table panelists - but soon enough. Soon. Enough.

5. Which inevitable couple are you more excited for, Serenate or Van?

Gossip Guy: I used to be the biggest Derena fan, but after two years of mourning, I'm finally over them and ready for both to move on. However, while I fully endorse Serena and Nate, I can never endorse anything involving V.

Mister Meester: Van. Don't get me wrong, I'm pro-Serenate. But I'm excited to see Danessa/Van as a couple. This is her best hope to become a solid character, rather than one we have to bring back our weekly Uselessness Scale for.

DANdy: Serenate. We all remember their hot sex on the bar, right?!? It's the reason I started watching this show.

6. Biggest shocker: Chuck's mother being alive, or Jenny dealing drugs?

Mister Meester: Jenny. Holy crap, J. We know how badly you wanna rule Constance, but effing drug-dealing!? Wow. Props to the writers for injecting (boo) some new life into the Jenny/queen drama. It could be a real high (boo!) point.

DANdy: Option C: Dan not nailing a cute girl that came on to him via a masturbation video of herself. Dude, Vanessa is into threesomes. She would have understood.

Gossip Guy: I can't possibly be shocked by anything Jenny does... except that one time we saw her without makeup. That was damn shocking.  Didn't even recognize the girl. Wait, where was I? Oh yeah, I guess the Chuck's mom thing was kind of obvious when Lily and Blair were discussing Chuck never being to his mother's grave, however, as far as Gossip Girl series-wide shockers, definitely Chuck's mom. Good for him because Lily is a terrible mother figure and the boy needs someone. Did you see that Emmy-award winning torment he portrayed this episode?


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Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Season 3 Episode 12 Quotes

Nate: You have two options. One. Man up, go to war and fight for the girl you love. Or just forget her. Move on to a palette cleanser. And forget her.
Dan: So you're saying my only choices are extreme emotional vulnerability with a good friend, or meaningless sex with a stranger.
Nate: Pretty much.
Dan: Alright.

Nate: Dan, do you really think if you went toe-to-toe with Paul Hoffman that you couldn't take him? You're using him as an excuse.
Dan: No. He's a handsome guy. He's a sophomore. He and Vanessa have a lot in common.
Nate: He's a douche.