The Tuesday Gossip Girl Reality Index Returns

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"Petty in Pink" featured some serious spying, scandal and sexiness, as well as a regal courtship for Blair. Our official review breaks the episode down in detail.

For further examination, we turn to one of favorite pieces of Gossip Girl media coverage, N.Y. Magazine's patented reality index. Behold, the weekly +/- scale:

  • Serena requires Charlie’s help to make an Internet search. Plus 2.
  • Serena: “Well, because if Vanessa is lying and it isn’t true, then I’m a horrible friend for believing her. But if it is true, then they’re horrible friends for not telling me.” Plus 10, because that pretty much sums up the whole series.
  • After seeing Blair and Dan at Paul Smith, Charlie correctly guesses that after sneaking around together for months, they’ve decided to attend a big social event together. She’s getting the hang of the Gossip Girl logic already. Plus 1.
  • Blair declines to wear a skirt that says,“Let’s skip dinner and make a sex tape,” for her date with Louis, but nonetheless owns such a skirt, probably from the time she and Chuck played, “I’m Coco and you’re Ice T.” Plus 2.
Playing Dress Up
  • Blair: “They moved the party.” Dan: “Who moves a party?” Has he even been paying attention to this show for the past four seasons? Minus 1.
  • Serena assigns her young, hot cousin to flirt with the ex that she’s clearly still interested in. Because that’s always a good idea. Minus 3.
  • Like Raina would have all her legal documents, like her birth certificate, in a shoebox. She probably wouldn’t even know that stuff existed. Minus 3.
  • That picture Charlie took of Blair and Dan was from less than ten feet away. Surely they would have noticed her? Minus 2, because Dan has already mentally decided to sleep with her, so he should at least be able to recognize her.

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.


Gossip Girl Quotes

And who am I? That's one secret I'll never tell ... You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl

[to Jenny] That's the thing. You need to be cool to be queen. Anne Boleyn thought only with her heart and she got her head chopped off. So her daughter Elizabeth made a vow never to marry a man. She married a country. Forget boys. Keep your eye on the prize, Jenny Humphrey. You can't make people love you, but you can make them fear you. For what it's worth, you're my Queen. I choose you.