Gossip Girl Round Table: "Beauty and the Feast"

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Welcome to the second Gossip Girl Round Table discussion of the season! Below, our panel breaks down the previous night's episode (see our official review from earlier this morning) in great detail.

Below, the TVF head honcho himself, Eric Hochberger (Gossip Guy), editor Steve Marsi (Mister Meester) and writers Courtney Morrison, Christina Tran and Leigh Raines discuss "Beauty and the Feast."

Weigh in with your take on the following topics after reading ours!


What was your favorite quote from the episode?

Courtney: "You'll always have me." I guess Dan is making sure he is no longer lonely boy. Dorota and Blair's exchanges at the doctor's come in as a close second though.

Christina: I am a fan of all Derena jabs. Hence, my favorite quote was: "Unlike Serena when I rejected you, I meant it."

Leigh: Since I can't go with the entire sequence of Blair and Dorota, I'll go with Lonely Boy: "Are you gonna go with me still in here? I don't think our friendship can handle that." Translated: Wait you're peeing in front of me? I spend all of my time with girls so I know immediately that this means you probably aren't trying to bang me.

Steve: Chuck almost wistfully recalling Dan's previous literary exploration of him, calling his new book "The return of Charlie Trout." That was a fun night in a jail cell ...

Eric: Pretty much everything out of Dorota's mouth.  But I think Steve said it best with his choice in review title, "Miss Blair Digest Everything Now."

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Pregnant Blair: Entertaining scandal or awful plot twist?

Courtney: I haven't decided yet. This could make for such a great adventure and give new depth to the characters. But I that why we love GG? Is Mommy Blair still going to be as entertaining a Queen B? Jury is still out.

Christina: I'm going with the former. I love seeing Blair scramble (even more than scheming). 

Leigh: The former. Pregnant Blair is the only character on this show who can turn morning sickness and pregnancy cravings into an stand up comedy routine.

Steve: I talked at length in my review about how hilarious I found Blair last night, but threw this out there to discuss the potentially dark future of this storyline: Blair will either tragically lose the baby or be outed as an unwed, pregnant bride-to-be (one way or another). Will this fairy tale end happily for her? I hope. But I worry.

Eric: Entertaining scandal! Did you not witness the amazing OB/GYN scene with Dorota and Blair? They're like sisters, err distant cousins.

Dan: Loyal friend or boring creeper?

Courtney: Loyal friend, no doubt. Writing a book about the group may be categorized as creeper, but he truly is a friend to Blair. Better than he was with S, Nate, or Vanessa.

Christina: Dan's definitely a loyal friend. Without what’s-her-face and Serena, he needed a female friend. Also, his eyes remind me of a loyal puppy.

Leigh: Just like Blair, I was grateful to see Dan at the feast. I'm going with loyal friend on this one.

Steve: Both. He a friend to Blair, no doubt. But the act of writing the book, as Courtney said, and the awkward way he acts around Nate and Chuck? Major creepin' alert. His interactions with Chuck are priceless, however.

Eric: Boring creeper. It's sad when I see one of my favorite characters relegated to the classic Gossip Girl spot of meddler. Wasn't that she-who-can't-be-named's role?

More gullible: Nate or Serena?

Courtney: Serena. Ivy/Charlie was leaving big gaping holes in her stories and S had no idea. She must be exhausted from all the hard work she has been doing...

Christina: I’d bet Nate would fall for the gullible written on the ceiling trick any day. Serena was definitely more gullible though. How many times did Charlie/Ivy almost slip? I lost count.

Leigh: Serena, definitely. She is the queen at believing obvious lies for the sake of companionship. I can't even count how many - oh wait - Georgina, Jenny, she who shall not be named, Juliet ... the list goes on and on.

Steve: You guys are all insane. Serena is not smart. Don't think for a second I'm suggesting that. But she's at least dealing with someone who is family (she thinks), who she knows (a little), who is an actress (albeit not a very good one) and would have no reason (in theory) to lie to her. Diana, meanwhile, is basically a stranger who shows up AT NATE'S MOM'S APARTMENT 3,000 MILES AWAY, tells him some story and he just buys it. Pathetic. Great sex scene, though. 

Eric: Serena. I can forgive Nate being Bedazzled by the Devil herself, Elizabeth Hurley. Again, see what I did there Movie Fanatics? I really must stop hijacking our Round Tables with these.

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Better villain: Beatrice or Diana?

Courtney: Right now I'm going with Diana. Mostly because I have a major girl crush on her and her amazing red dress. It's too soon to tell with Beatrice although if she has a priest on her side, things are bound to get interesting.

Christina: I can't say that I cared too much for either, but if I had to choose... I'd go with Beatrice. The “priest” and Beatrice are obviously up to no good, and I’m ready to see them wreak havoc. 

Leigh: I want to pick Elizabeth Hurley, but she's too lovable to be deemed a real villain! (Even as the devil in Bedazzled, thanks Eric). Beatrice seems as beautiful as she is devious, someone who fits in perfectly with this crew. Blair can't dismiss her immediately, so we know she's here to stay.

Steve: Tough one. Beatrice is seems like the more duplicitous of the two, but Diana is setting her sights on Gossip Girl herself. That kind of gumption makes her formidable. Eric will now discuss her other attributes.

Eric: Diana. It might just be the massive crush I've had on Hurley since I first met her in Austin Powers, but I'm loving her on this show. Even if her being a villain is manipulating Nate, which is pretty much taking candy from a pretty baby.

Harder to believe: Chuck's inability to feel pain, or Charlie/Ivy ... in general.

Courtney: Charlie/ivy in general. Chuck is numb from losing so much and not grieving. I'm with everyone else in wondering why this character is now a series regular.

Christina: Charlie/Ivy. I actually like the painless Chuck storyline. It’s deep, and I’ve grown tiresome of seeing Chuck vying for B or his company. As for the Charlie/Ivy storyline, I can only hope that the writers kill it or her ASAP.  

Leigh: Charlie/Ivy. I understand they wanted another series regular, but all of her thinly-veiled lies have her hanging by a thread. 

Steve: Chuck. It's not unrealistic at all that he's emotional empty, or does extreme things just to feel alive. They could have, and should have left it at that, but the idea that he doesn't physically feel already-cracked ribs during or after an ass whomping in an alley is flat-out ridiculous. He's not Super Bass.

Eric: Charlie/Ivy. Remind me why she's a series regular and we're bringing her back to the UES?

What do you think Rufus and Lily were up to?

Courtney: Lily is shopping online building up her post house arrest wardrobe. Rufus is in the Hamptons cooking chili and wondering how he got into this mess.

Christina: Lily is redecorating the loft... still. Rufus is working on a revamped breakfast menu.

Leigh: Rufus is trying to perfect his latest gourmet waffle recipe so he and Lily can impress Andy Cohen when they have him over for breakfast to negotiate Lily's first post house-arrest appearance on Bravo's Watch What Happens Live.

Steve: Remember when those two were semi-central characters on the show and we didn't have to write absurd questions like this? Neither do I. Coming in future Round Tables: The Rufus Uselessness Scale!

Eric: I have to assume with his wife in jail, or on house arrest, or whatever, Rufus is running out of handbags to carry around. Maybe desperate to find something to do, he decided to reunite the boys of Lincoln Hawk and tour the local retirement communities of South Florida. Yeah, super irrelevant has beens really do that down here. And I'd love to go see Lincoln Hawk. Call it wishful thinking.

What do you think? Sound off in the comments!

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Season 5 Episode 2 Quotes

OB GYN: Dorota, how are you?
Blair: She's fine. I'm Blair, Dorota's employer. I have a few questions.
Dorota: Just go with it. Is only way.
Blair: What about breast sensitivity? She practically screams when anyone touches them. I can hear her all the way in Queens.
Doctor: Perfectly normal.
Blair: Great. And how long until she can determine the father of her child? She's had a few one night stands with the staff of our building...
Dorota: Blair Cornelia Waldorf!

Dan: Blair, what's going on? I thought you were mad at me.
Blair: And I forgive you if you shut up and guard the door.
Dan: It's not like you to forgive me. Or run away from a feast.