So much of the Bag of Bones miniseries just left me scratching my head. After reviewing part one yesterday, I get into the concluding two hours of this Stephen King-based special below...
First head-scratcher of the evening? Why did Mattie, who Michael barely knew, go to his house to share good news about her daughter's custody battle? Could she really have that few friends in town? I assumed she grew up there. It was also amazing what his quick run-in with Kyra did to derail a multimillionaire's case against his daughter-in-law who killed her husband. It just didn't make sense.
Mattie is pretty, and Michael is hot, so I guess that was good enough for the writers. Two attractive, slightly spunky outsiders come together at time when neither of them have anyone. Seemingly as strong a reason as any other, I suppose. I prefer more depth in my relationships, and I just don't feel it here.
One thing is for certain, old Max Devore and his pal Rogette wanted to see Michael gone, and if not gone, dead. He was not welcome in their family business. But what did he do, really, to raise their ire to such a degree? He merely used his smart-ass tone to tell the guardian ad lied-em what he didn't want to hear. Hardly a death sentence, I would think, even though that surly old bird was trying to knock his head a good one with the pelting of those rocks.
Did anyone else just cringe in pain when Noonan's cell phone fell to the bottom of the lake? Oh, how I would have cried!! Even one day without my beloved cell phone is one too many. Devore's obvious punishment was a shot of morphine and a bag over his head. That it was in a warm bath was too sweet, but he did get kissed by a crone, so perhaps even sugar has its price. By this point, I admit I was sorely lost within a twisted storyline that seemed to have no end.
The group of mad junior men raping a woman, especially a woman of color, back in the day, has been do too many times and with no new results. The story is old, ugly and not worthy of repeating. Granted, this was based on a book written about 20 years ago, so there is some room for forgiveness, but if I never see the storyline again, I wouldn't miss it nor what it represents one tiny bit.
"Custody has it's responsibility. Now you go and bring that whorlette over here and stick her in the water where she belongs." THAT's what the phrase meant? If you have custody of a girl in the line of the men who killed Sara Tidwell, you must drown them?I don't believe Sara would have thought so little of all men; after all, she made a living off of making those men swoon.
A curse was a fitting ending to the legacy of Sara Tidwell. Drowning their daughters for generations to come. I liked that Mattie figured Jo was worried about their daughter and her future due to the curse. It gave Mattie a purpose in this story, brought her closer to Mike and allowed him to forgive Jo and let her go. Had they waited one second longer, it would have been too late. Jo, Mattie, Kyra and Sara were all severely underdeveloped in this passion play about a woman done wrong.
By the end, I felt like I was watching an episode of Supernatural, as the only way to stop the curse was to decimate Sara's bones (remains? They looked amazing) in lye. I still think she got the raw end of the deal overall. Sure, she cast the curse, but shouldn't the bones of those men who committed the crime have had some culpability as well? And the blow-back of the lye; no damage to Mike? Note to self, look up the consequences of lye on skin. Finally, if ever there was a need for a little leftover lye, it was for Rogette.
Because I am a liar, and good to my word on being one, I will leave you with one last comment in relation to the book and the adaptation: The adaptation, as far more macabre than the book, left me far more unsettled and lost much of the beauty portrayed in Stephen King's masterful tome. If you enjoyed the miniseries, don't hesitate to try the structure that came first.
Carissa Pavlica is the managing editor and a staff writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.