11 Bachelorette Contestant Bios That Stand Out... For The Wrong Reasons
Sarah Hearon
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To get ready for the premiere of The Bachelorette, ABC released pictures and bios of the men competing to win the heart of lucky Bachelorette 13: Rachel Lindsay.
And while some of Rachel’s suitors seem normal, others seem… unique.
Personally, I’m convinced some of the contestants don’t realize their answers are going to be published on the Internet, and the majority of contestants just let the producers answer the questions for them.
Either way, here are 11 contestants that I’m predicting won’t be getting down on one knee to propose to Rachel, but will probably find themselves as a meme or on the beach in Paradise.
1. Blake E.
Blake’s occupation is “aspiring drummer” and he was engaged to his ex for a brief 48 hours. In other words, he is unemployed and can’t keep a commitment. Next!
2. Bryce
Bryce’s dream job is a “professional instagrammer,” so while came to the right place (the Bachelor mansion) to get more followers, it’s a red flag that he’s so into social media. And doesn’t want a real job.
3. Dean
Dean signed up for a show that almost always ends in an engagement but thinks “marriage is an institutionalized sham derived from religious beliefs.” Something tells me that this might interfere with ABC’s plans for a televised wedding.
4. DeMario
One positive thing about DeMario is that he’s honest, but admitting how much he loves attention sounds like a campaign for the next Bachelor (or next Corinne) to me. “I won't lie, I love attention… not like '07 B. Spears attention or 2011 Sheen. Natural attention like when Justin and Brit wore those incredible denim outfits,” he said.
5. Diggy
Nothing should make Rachel feel loved like a guy who would rather nap than help find her missing brother. “I spent all day with this girl and she ended up coming home with me and we had sex. She then received a text saying her brother was missing, so I played asleep so I didn't have to help!” Such a funny story, Diggy!
6. Fred
Fred loves it when his date pays for the meal and gets aroused at work and has to sneak back to his desk without getting noticed. Fred is cheap and creepy.
7. Jedidiah
Jedidiah loves traveling so much that he casually had sex “off the continental divide on a glacier in the mountains” and thinks South Africa is incredible because of the “great coffee, tea, wine, fruit, food, beautiful animals and landscapes, amazing people and very real problems like HIV and violence.” Rachel is better off not traveling with Jedidiah.
8. Jonathan
Jonathan’s occupation is “tickle monster.” I think this one speaks for itself.
9. Kyle
When asked about his ideal mate’s looks, Kyle answered “7+.” When asked about following a specific diet, Kylie answered “Not really sure what [gluten] is or what food it lives in, but I select gluten-free menu options when I can.” Any guy who is still rating women and doesn’t know what gluten is, isn’t ready to get married.
10. Lucas
Lucas listed his occupation as “Whaboom.” I don't know what that means, but I honestly don't want to. And I bet Rachel doesn't either.
11. Milton
When Milton was asked what he hopes to get out of participating in this television show, he said “discovered.” Milton’s here for the wrong reasons and he’s not even smart enough to try and deny it.
