Lionel Hutz was the go to ambulence chaser of Springfield until Phil Hartman's untimely death in 1998.  Since then, this pathetic excuse for a lawyer has been retired and that's a shame... he was hilarious!

Lionel Hutz Quotes

I'm here defending you on the charges of . . . (looks at sheet) Murder One!? Even if I lose I'll be famous!

Lionel Hutz

(Grampa mourns Bea alone in his room.)
Lionel Hutz: It was a beautiful service, wasn't it, Mr. Simpson?
Grampa: (Yells) Who the hell are you?
Lionel Hutz: Lionel Hutz, attorney-at-law! I'm the executor of Beatrice Simmons' estate. Mr. Simpson, Bea was a wealthy woman and, surprise, surprise, she left everything to you.
Grampa: Really?
Lionel Hutz: There is one catch. You must spend one night ina haunted house!
Grampa: (Gasps)
Lionel Hutz: (Chuckles) Just kidding, just kidding.

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The Simpsons Quotes

Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and um Oh, wait a minute! Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman!

Homer

You know, you remind me of a poem I can't remember, and a song that may never have existed, and a place I'm not sure I've ever been to.

Grampa