Reverend Timothy Lovejoy is the reverend of The First Church of Springfield, the local protestant church that The Simpsons and most of their friends attend.  Although Lovejoy initially was a caring minister, he became apathetic after constant annoyances by Ned Flanders.  He is married to the town gossip, Helen, and has a rarely seen daughter Jessica.

Reverend Lovejoy Quotes

(Using the phone, Ned Flanders seeks some counsel in the middle of the night.)
Ned: Hello, Reverend Lovejoy?
Helen Lovejoy: (Yawns) No. This is Mrs. Lovejoy. (Sighs) Just a minute. (Covers the phone) Honey. Honey, wake up. It sounds like Ned Flanders is having some sort of crisis.
Reverend Lovejoy: (Groans) Probably stepped on a worm.

Good people, I'm so happy you're all here tonight. But please, just a few words of caution. Now, we are going to set this pile of evil ablaze, but because these are children's toys, the fire will spread quickly, so please stand back and try not to inhale the toxic fumes.

Reverend Lovejoy

The Simpsons Quotes

(Bart shows the whole classroom the tape for his project called, "How Kittens Are Born: The Ugly Truth")
Bart: and here comes Snowball II. This is the one we kept.
All: EWW!!
Bart: We were gonna keep the gray one, but the mother ate her.
All: EWWWWW!!
Martin: Mrs. Krabappel, he's traumatizing the children!
Mrs. Krabappel: As usual, I agree with you, Martin. Bart, shut that off and take your seat immediately!
Bart: Oh, look! This is really cool. When I hit reverse, I can make 'em go back in.
(The whole classroom screams)

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!