Walden Schmidt

Ashton Kutcher joined the cast of Two and a Half Men as Walden Schmidt, an Internet billionaire who buys Charlie Harper's Malibu beach home after the latter passed away.  Walden is recently having marital problems and who better to give him advice than his new roommate, Alan?

Walden Schmidt Quotes

Alan: The only reason to wear a hat on a date is to cover a bald spot.
Walden: Here you go, for your next date.

Walden: How do I look?
Alan: Your face should be on gay money.

Walden Schmidt Photos

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Two and a Half Men Quotes

Jake: If drinking makes you feel bad, why do you drink?
Charlie: Nobody likes a smart ass, kid.
Jake: You have to put a dollar in the swear jar. You said "ass."
Charlie: Tell you what. Here's a twenty. That ought to cover me until lunch

Woman [to Charlie about Jake]: You guys are really great together.
Charlie: Thanks.
Woman: Your wife must be proud.
Charlie: Oh, no, I'm not married.
Woman: Too bad.
Charlie: Wow, you're even better than a dog

Two and a Half Men

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