Brian: Having sex with Quagmire is inevitable, like a fat guy ordering dessert when everyone else wants to leave. Waiter: Would anyone like dessert? Man: I couldn't eat another thing. Woman: I gotta get home for the sitter. Fat Man: I'll have the souffle. Waiter: That takes 45 minutes. Fat Man: That's okay.
[disappointedly] You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes ya feel any better. I'm an easy target. Yeah. You're right. I talk too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you, but I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Well, you think what you want about me. I'm not changin'. I like me. My kids like me. My friends like me. 'Cause I'm the real article. What you see is what you get.