The New Matress

The New Matress

Lois makes a reluctant Peter buy a new matress for their bedroom on Family Guy "Guy Robot"
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Joe's Dad - Family Guy

Joe's Dad - Family Guy

The guys track down Joe's Dad but find out that he may have issues with people with disabilities on Family Guy, "Papa Has a Rollin' Son"
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An Evil Bar of Soap - Family Guy

An Evil Bar of Soap - Family Guy

An asylum, a murder and an evil bar of soap all appear on "Peternormal Activity" the season premiere of Family Guy.
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Bonding with Brian - Family Guy Season 13 Episode 16

Bonding with Brian - Family Guy Season 13 Episode 16

Peter sits here with Brian in a scene from Family Guy. He looks pretty upset, doesn't he?
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250th Episode - Family Guy

250th Episode - Family Guy

Peter plans to fight Liam Neeson (guest voicing himself) on "Fighting Irish" the 250th episode of Family Guy.
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Obedience School - Family Guy

Obedience School - Family Guy

Peter realizes that he liked Brian better before he sent him to obedience school on Family Guy. "Once Bitten" is the 15th episode of the show's 13th episode.
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Road Trip - Family Guy

Road Trip - Family Guy

Joe decides to take Peter, Quagmire and Cleveland on a road trip to Niagara Falls on Family Guy. "JOLO"
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The Detective Agency - Family Guy

The Detective Agency - Family Guy

Peter and his friends decide to form a detective agency on Family Guy. "Encyclopedia Griffin" is the 11th episode of the show's 13th season.
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Jesus Birthday - Family Guy

Jesus Birthday - Family Guy

Peter wants to throw Jesus a birthday party on Family Guy, "The 2000 Year Old Virgin"
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Scaring Up Customers - Family Guy

Scaring Up Customers - Family Guy

Peter comes up with a new way of scaring up customers on Family Guy. "Baking Bad" is the third episode of the show's 13th season.
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Stewie Gets Steamed

Stewie Gets Steamed

Stewie is upset when his TV time is interupted on the season finale of Family Guy.
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Wife Fight

Wife Fight

When their wives argue, Cleveland and Peter find it difficult to hang out on Family Guy. "He's Bla-ack!" is the 20th episode of the show's 12th season.
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Family Guy Quotes

Death Star Officer 1: Any attack made by the Rebels against this station would be a useless gesture, no matter what technical data they've obtained. This station is now the ultimate power in the universe.
Stewie (Darth Vader): That is fantastic! Terrific work! So no weaknesses at all, huh?
Death Star Officer 1: N- (considers) no.
Stewie (Darth Vader): You, uh, you hesitated there. Is there something I should know?
Death Star Officer 1: No, it's virtually indestructable, like 99.99 percent.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Uh...OK, wouldn't be doin' my job if I didn't ask what's the .01?
Death Star Officer 1: Well, I- I mean, there's this little hole, it was kind of an aesthetic choice by the architect, and if you shoot a laser into this hole, uh, the station blows up.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that sounds like a pretty big design flaw there.
Death Star Officer 1: No, no, no the hole's only two meters across.
Mayor Adam West (Grand Moff Tarkin): Well, that's no bigger than a womp rat.
Death Star Officer 1: Exactly. And even to get within range of it, you have to skim along this whole trench, it's not a big deal.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Well, I mean, I mean, can't we board it up or, you know, put some plywood over it or something?
Death Star Officer 1: Well, that would look terrible! I mean, we got to think about re-sale.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Re-sale? Wh-what are you talking about? This property is right above Sunset, the value's only gonna go up.
Death Star Officer 1: Lord Vader, your inside references to the Los Angeles real estate market haven't given you the clairvoyance to turn a profit on that condo in Glendale, nor has it-
(Vader begins choking him with the Force)
Stewie (Darth Vader): I find your lack of faith disturbing. That property is in a prime location, twenty minutes to the beach, twenty minutes to downtown!
Death Star Officer 1: (choking) There's nothing to do downtown!
Mayor Adam West (Grand Moff Tarkin): Enough of this! Vader, release him.
Stewie (Darth Vader): As you wish. (releases the officer, who collapses on the table, gasping for air) All right, so we gonna plug up that hole?
Death Star Officer 2: Yeah, we can get it done tomorrow if price is no object.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Eyuuuuh...
Death Star Officer 2: We'll get estimates.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Yeah, get estimates, yeah ha, yeah, yeah ha ha, yeah.

Stewie: (Comes into the bedroom) Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois: What!?
Stewie: Hi! (Giggling and running out of the room)