Meet the Parents

Despite his best attempts to avoid meeting Chelsea's parents, he finds them in his living room.
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Charlie Gets a Colonoscopy

Charlie gets a colonoscopy in order to avoid spending time with Chelsea's parents. Makes sense.
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Charlie and Angie

Charlie tries to calm his older girlfriend, Angie (Susan Blakely) down as she hits the booze.
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Alan Yells at Jake

When Jake has a book report to do and keeps losing the book, Alan tries to get his son to get his work done.
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Two and a Half Men CSI Picture

In a parody of CSI, there's a murder investigation on Two and a Half Men and everyone's a suspect.
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Wedding Rehearsal

Charlie and Alan attend the wedding rehearsal of Evelyn and her fiance, Teddy.
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Charlie in Therapy

Charlie goes to therapy where he discovers he missed Mia, the one who got away.
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Alan and a Prostitute

When Alan can't stand the idea of getting emotionally involved with another woman, he has Charlie hire him a prostitute.
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Picking up Jake

Charlie and Alan show up to pick up Jake from Judith's.
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Rose Takes Care of Charlie

Rose comes back from England and plays nurse to Charlie when he becomes ill.
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Alan Seeks Advice

When Alan needs to dump a girl he seeks advice from the master himself, Charlie.
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Alan in Cycling Gear

Alan thinks he's racing in the Tour De France when he goes for a bike ride.
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Two and a Half Men Quotes

Jake: If drinking makes you feel bad, why do you drink?
Charlie: Nobody likes a smart ass, kid.
Jake: You have to put a dollar in the swear jar. You said "ass."
Charlie: Tell you what. Here's a twenty. That ought to cover me until lunch

Woman [to Charlie about Jake]: You guys are really great together.
Charlie: Thanks.
Woman: Your wife must be proud.
Charlie: Oh, no, I'm not married.
Woman: Too bad.
Charlie: Wow, you're even better than a dog