The idea of dancing in front of anything other than a mirror scares some people to death, and who can blame them? Having a sense of rhythm is hard enough without adding the thought of embarrassment in front of other people.
If are one of those people who would rather jump off a bridge than risk the shame of fumbling in front of others, then these characters are vessels through which you can continue to live vicariously. Even if you fancy yourself a good dancer, these characters are guaranteed to make you question just how good you are.
Here are our picks of the top 21 characters you’d be wise not to challenge to a dance-off. Feel free to chip in with your favorites who weren’t included who you believe would obliterate them in a dance battle.
John Bennett (Orange Is The New Black) Litchfield had a lot of creepy guards who abused the prisoners and took advantage of them every chance they got which is why Bennett was a welcome addition, despite the questionable nature of his relationship with Daya. Too bad she gave up the kid to another family because growing up with a dad who can dance that well would’ve been awesome.
Good Janet (The Good Place) We only got to see it a couple of times, but Janet is surprisingly good at shaking what her Momma gave her. Her marriage to Jason may not have lasted long but the memory of them having their first dance, to the shock of everyone, is something we will not forget soon.
Sam Gardner (Atypical) Okay, I’ve got to be honest here — those are some very rudimentary moves Sam picked up. But he deserves some slack because he learned them when he was much younger. And also because his confidence is so high he is willing to bust a move anytime, anywhere, and that is key here.
(Jordin Althaus/Netflix) Tiana (Empire) Every step she takes oozes sexiness and finesse. It wouldn’t be overselling it when I say everyone on either side of the screen watching her wishes they could move as she does.
Jack Johnson (Blacki-ish) Dre may believe he’d never get into college, but that doesn’t mean Jack isn’t blessed with other talents that aren’t academically inclined. He showed us how well he could do the stanky leg which is no mean feat. Ask any terrible dancer.
Alex Crane (Star) All three girls can hold their own on the dance floor and could’ve each made the list, but the standout among them is, without question, Alex Crane. Her ability to blend her steps seamlessly with every beat is unrivaled.
Waverly Earp (Wynonna Earp) It ended on a weird note because her sister, Wynonna, walked in at the wrong moment and Waverly accidentally flashed her pantyless lower half to the wrong person. Regardless, that cheerleading routine was top notch.
Capt. Raymond Holt (Brooklyn Nine-Nine) Capt. Holt showed everyone that it is possible to defuse tense, confrontational situations without pulling out a firearm by annihilating a street dancer with some sick, robot-freestyle moves.
Xiomara Villanueva (Jane The Virgin) Xo has been put through the wringer, but one of the few things that has always brought her joy is dancing. She might not have won that dance competition, but it was delightful to watch her do her thing nonetheless.
Dean Winchester (Supernatural) There is so much to love about dean: His excellent taste in music, killing demons while delivering the best one-liners, consuming all kinds of pies, and the ability to make rock music seem like something you can actually dance to. You can try, but just make sure no one is recording with a camera.
Sara Lance (Legends Of Tomorrow) After dropping in on 1975 in The Waverider, some of the legends head to a bar where Sara decides to let off some steam by getting her groove on. Until some creeps tried to grind on her, and she was forced to start breaking bottles and bones. But before that happened, she made us believe dancing alone on an empty floor is not weird at all.
Kat Edison (The Bold Type) This one left a bit of a sour taste in our mouths because it led to Kat making out with a woman that wasn’t Adena which then snowballed into that God-awful non-monogamy storyline. Maybe we haven’t made it clear by now, but if the Adena and Kat pairing isn’t the end game, then we’re going to throw all our devices with a screen into the nearest river, move out of our homes and live out the rest of our lives as hermits. My heart isn’t in a place to take more heartbreaks right now.
Carlton And The Fresh Prince (The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air) The kings of goofy dances. But make no mistake, they’d outshine you in every way with their almost infinite routines.
Fiona Gallagher (Shameless) Things were looking up for Fiona, and she was feeling particularly good after a nice shower when Gladius’ 24 Karat came on the radio, and if you are familiar with the track, then you know the hook on that song is practically begging you to bop along to the beat, and bop she did.
Courtney Rose (The Mayor) After his actions drove away the woman he clearly had a thing for, Mayor Rose enlisted the help of his friends and a very retro-looking boom box and made a beeline for her window in the middle of the day to apologize by dancing.
Barry Allen (The Flash) Barry and his offspring just can’t stop messing with the multiverse and the timeline, and at this rate, the space-time continuum is going to crumble and everyone wiped from existence unless the speed force makes the grave mistake of challenging the Flash to a dance-off to decide the fate of the universe.
Ian Gallagher (Shameless) An underage kid dancing in a club in problematic in so many ways, but we’re willing to overlook the implications and focus instead on Ian’s graceful body. Yeah, that sounded just as creepy when put in context, but it is what it is.
Gina Linetti (Brooklyn Nine-Nine) The self-described human form of the 100 emoji, Gina is going to be sorely missed when she exits the 99th Precinct, and our lives, for good. We did get to see her dance group perform onstage, and they were actually not that terrible.
Michael Cordero (Jane The Virgin) After Bruno Mars stunned everyone by making an appearance at Jane and Michael’s wedding, the groom had the dance floor all to himself and did not disappoint.
Jason Mendoza (The Good Place) Jason finally coming to the realization that there is more to life than amateur street dance competitions was kind of a devil’s bargain, and a little cruel, if you ask me because it came not long after he showed off some serious moves onstage.
Kara Danvers (Supergirl) The Girl of Steel naturally doesn’t find herself in situations where a lot of dancing is required, but in the few scenarios that she did, she went toe to toe with the fastest man alive. It wasn’t a competition, but I’d say she definitely matched, and maybe even surpassed, his level of dorkiness with a dance number. And then there was this karaoke scene.