Martin: As a natural enemy, I don't know why I should care, but the information pertaining to America's colonial period that you just received is erroneous.
Bart: So, you're saying--
Martin: A blindfolded chimp with a pencil in his teeth has a better chance at passing this test than you do.


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Characters:
Bart Simpson, Martin Prince
Episode:
The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 1: "Bart Gets an F"
Show:
The Simpsons
Related Quotes:
Bart Simpson Quotes, Martin Prince Quotes, The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 1 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 1 Quotes

Who would have thought that pushing a boy into the girls' lavatory could be such a thrill? The screams! The humiliation! The fact that it wasn't me! I've never felt so alive.

Martin

Bart: (prays) Well, old-timer, I guess this is the end of the road. I know I haven't always been a good kid, but if I have to go to school tomorrow, I'll fail the test and be held back. I just need one more day to study, Lord. I need your help.
Lisa: (spying on Bart) Prayer. The last refuge of a scoundrel.
Bart: A teachers' strike, a power failure, a blizzard. Anything that'll cancel school tomorrow. I know it's asking a lot, but if anyone can do it, You can. Thanking You in advance, Your pal, Bart Simpson.